My Little Light

More For My Daddy: Have Some Left-over Cake For Breakfast

2010-10-21T23:39:00.000-07:00

If you read my last post, you are likely aware that I find birthdays to be a particularly signifigant holiday celebrating not only the portion of life that has been lived but also whatever time an individual has left on earth, and how God might orchestrate the events of an individual's life to bring more people into a relationship with him. One way to ensure one never forgets that God created him or her for a special purpose is to never stop celebrating one's birthday. Now, that, that may seem a bit self-indulgent, but I guarentee it is effective, and it gives you an excuse to have a huge piece of left-over birthday cake with a glass of milk for breakfast the day after, so Daddy, while you enjoy your breakfast the day after whether it be cake or cereal, here are a few more words for you.
In closing yesterday I made a thank-you list, and I have come up with a few thank-yous that I missed, so thank you for sitting by my hospital bed like a bull-dog after my stroke waiting to rip the head off anyone who threatened my comfort or might unintentionally inflict further pain or loss in your baby girl's life, for faithfully and committedly providing for my family, and in doing so, allowing mom to stay home with us in a time when it was in vogue for women to return to the work place, for setting a stellar example for me of a man of character, so that when pop psychology's theory that a girl will choose a man as her husband who is like her father came to fruition in my own life, despite how many times I had refuted the validity of said theory in my mind, I ended up with a man whose faithfulness and concept of commitment rivals only your own, who provides generously for my family while sharing in an equally generous manner with anyone he encounters in need, who allows me to stay home and raise my sweet, passionate, Lili with no complaint, and who helps me feel as safe and secure in this world as you always did. Thank you for setting that precident for me because, now, it has become Lili's to own as she grows and chooses a mate. It is my fervent prayer on many a night that as pop-psychology proved accurate in my life that it will in Lili's! Other than hoping that Lili will love the Lord and serve him with her life, my greatest hope is that she will find a man like her Daddy, like my Daddy, with whom to share her life. Please, don't refute everything I've said with a barrage of negative, mental, personal put-downs because I have simply written the truth while realizing you're not perfect, so it becomes very evident to me that perfection isn't a necessary characteristic for being an AWESOME dad!:) I love you, and I'm as glad today that you were born and for your life as I was yesterday!:)

Happy Birthday, Daddy!

2010-10-21T12:44:00.000-07:00

67 years ago today the man I know as my Daddy entered this world. For his birthday I want him to know that his youngest child is not only proud of him and the many noteworthy projects he has completed since the day of his birth, but also, I am proud to possess many of the personality characteriatics that make him a unique and dynamic individual! According to the Psalmist, when we are conceived God "knits" us together in our mother's womb, and accepting this as God's truth as I acknowledge science's findings about reproduction, I believe that when he created me, God took a few select and intentional strands of my father's DNA and knit them together with an equal number of strands from my mother's DNA to form me into an individual capable of certain specific tasks that he had designed for me to accomplish in my lifetime in order to expand his kingdom here on earth, which means to me that my life along with every other human being that has ever been and will ever be in existence is intended to grow the number of people on this earth who know, love, trust, and follow their creator. As I reflect on the person my father is in comparison to the person I am today, I can identify one or two characteristics in my personality that must have been contained on the yarn-like DNA strands that God handpicked from my father when he made me 31 years ago. The most predominate characteristic in both our personalities is intense passion no matter what emotion or activity we are experiencing whether it be happiness, sadness, anxiety, compassion it is likely to be an intensely passionate experience for us and anyone within our direct vacinity. Less obvious to my father because he considers himself inadequately educated in a traditional sense and a bad speller, is that we both love words and learning, and every area of our existence being fueled by our passionate nature, we have a tendancy toward articulate verbal and written artistic expression. I enjoy possessing both of these characteristics handed down to me by my Daddy, and I am pleased to report that I can already detect signs of their presence in the sweet life of my daughter:) Based on comments my father has made in recent years, I have gathered that one of his major life regrets is the amount of time he was away while I was growing up due to his passionate personality in combination with his career creating a great deal of professional success, which ultimately resulted in frequent business travel. All I can say in response to that I, " pshaw!" He was around enough for me to learn from his example that it is important to stand up for what we know is right and true, and that belief is something to contend with when combined with our passion! My Daddy's example also taught me to value people no matter their position in society, and to dig deep into the word of God. I am happy to be the person I am today, and I am pleased to give my father credit for helping me become that person! Happy 67th Birthday, Daddy!:) Thank you for being the main character in my earliest memory of you singing and rocking me to sleep, for running along beside me hollering encouragements at cross-country meets even though it annoyed me at the time, for taking me on business trips to Washington D.C. with you, for allowing mom to squander all your hard earned money on clothes during my teen years, for running all over the states to find the exact color of the NIKE running watch that I picked out in my running magazine until you found it ( I still have that watch because that meant a lot to me that you went to all that trouble, and I know that is probably just the one time of many of which I am aware!), and for the look of compassion that you were unable to express when I was crying because a boy hurt my teenage pride. I love you, and you were around enough for me to be confident of that, and I think that makes you a GREAT Daddy!

BRAT

2010-10-06T16:15:00.000-07:00

I have lived a life that has been very generously blessed by the Lord even in trials, and for the most part, I have unabashedly proclaimed my unending gratitude to him from whom according to scripture every good and perfect gift comes, but I am terribly ashamed to report that my professed gratitude has been an unintentional facade distracting both myself and everyone around me from the ugly, nasty, hateful brat that hid beneath the surface. I continually pray that God will grow me and mature me into the woman he created me to be, and it seems that my most recent utterances of this prayer have been answered in the past 24 hours beginning with the phone call my husband received last night unraveling the few strands of stability to which we hold in light of our recent dilemma. While attempting to trust God with our future, I was able to catch a few glimpses of the direction in which God might be leading us, and instantaneously, I succumbed to the temptation to start piecing together a plan of which I approved as a path of minimal loss for myself and my family. Unfortunately, last night that plan was trampled by reality, and my shameful response was to become so angry with God that I could not bare to crack open my Bible or speak to him in prayer, yes, what I am saying is I dared give the Creator of the Universe the silent treatment!:( The source of my anger were the ridiculous thoughts,"Why are you doing this to me?...Haven't you taken enough already?...What have I done to deserve this?...I've done everything you've asked of me and more! I praised you even after you allowed me to become disabled!...Don't I deserve a break?!" Can't you just invision me stomping my childish little spiritual foot with my spirit's hands fisted as I mentally ranted at God through my tears and disappointment!? I knew my response was wrong, but I could not control it because, for those of you who think I'm good, my bratty nature just took control, and, to my shame, I submitted to it until this morning when I mercifully awoke unsmote by the all-powerful God whom I had beat up on all night with my silent musings. This morning after I dropped Lili off at pre-school, I headed to the church for the women's Wednesday morning Bible study that I teach although I had seriously considered skipping because my class wasn't even meeting today since it was our week to help with childcare, but despite my assumption it would be a waste of time, I drove to the church ready to corral toddlers while their mother's attended classes. What I didn't realize was that God had a special, undeserved treat for me diguised as a preschool choir practice that I got to attend. The choir director played a cd of the musical the children would be perfprming for their parents later in the semester as a means of familiarizing the kids with the monologues spoken by the narrator in relation to the musical pieces they would be singing. At one point, the narrator reminded us that Jesus chose to leave the riches and comfort of Heaven to live on this wretched earth as a homeless, wandering prophet speaking to me that God was asking me to endure graciously no more than he had been willing to endure on my behalf! Boy, did I feel like a BIG dumby in the moment of that realization! While I was still blushing from the shame of that insight, the lyrics of the song that followed nearly brought me to tears, "Jesus is my very best friend...I will love him to the end...all my life I'll follow him...Jesus is my friend!" In my mind I finished each phrase with, " and I've been a really crappy friend in return!:(" The joy of the Lord shone through my self-imposed spiritual exhile at this point because I knew that I was forgiven, and even after being such a turd, he was giving me a fresh start:) This is exactly why Jesus is my very best friend and with all my life I'll follow him!

Facebook Fast-October 2010

2010-10-03T13:10:00.000-07:00

Recently, a series of unfortunate events have necessitated that my family pack up all our belongings and move away from the blissfully perfect home that we began inhabiting only two short years ago following my stroke (see past post: The House That God Built). Currently, we are still in the packing up stage of this scenario, and we do not yet know where we are going with all our boxed belongings come the middle of October. You don't have to be a 31-year-old mother of a 4-year-old daughter who just got established in an excellent Montesorri preschool, whose involvement in her church gives her life focus and meaning to comprehend the heart-wrenching pain and disappointment caused by moving unexpectedly from the home and community in which you believed you would grow old happily with your spouse enjoying the bounty of God's blessing while raising your family. Although my husband and I have claimed God's provision and good and perfect plan for our lives from the onset of this storm timed so perfectly two years after the last massively damaging storm front passed through our lives, we find ourselves struggling to submit to these life events with the same peace and assurance as we where able during the last storm. By the way, we are hoping a biannual storm pattern has not established itself in God's plan for our lives!
Just this morning as I took in the beautiful sight created by the early morning sun transforming the unharvested, dried corn stalks in the field bordering our property into shimmering gold dancing, in the cool, autumn breeze, to the sound track of twittering birds, I mourned like I hadn't yet in the three weeks since my life's course had been set in this direction. The tears that streaked down my face spoiling my seldom worn make-up where tailed closely by guilt for failing to be filled with God's peace and joy as I faced uncertain circumstances with God at my side, so later that morning while awaiting my teaching time during the Sunday morning youth program at my church, I was thouroughly blessed to hear this scripture from Nehemiah recording the Godly prophet Nehemiah's response to learning of his home's destruction. Nehemiah 1:3-4 They said to me, " Those who survived the exhile and are back in the province are in great trouble and disgrace. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down, and its gates have been burnedwith fire." When I heard these things I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven. This spoke to me that my mourning was normal and okay but that I was missing two essential components to the equation of victoriously facing such overwhelming disappointment, so this week I am committed to adding a time of fasting and prayer to my regimine of mourning while I pack and gratefully recognize the perfection of the time of excessive blessing that is passing. I will fast not from food but from the use of facebook and will spend time in scripture and prayer each time I long to log on to my favorite social network. I will begin by reading the book of Nehemiah because this book of the Bible seems to have special significance to my current situation, and through careful consideration of this ancient man's interaction with God as he attempts to rebuild from the rubble and ashes the city that once stood for the glory of God and the protection of his people, I will follow his lead as I attempt to put the pieces of my shattered life back together in a manner that honors God and fits into his good and perfect will for mine, Tim, and Lili's life!:)

A Post For The Dear Boy From Rutgers: Homosexuality Should NOT Be A Death Sentence

2010-10-01T12:13:00.000-07:00

This post has been a long time coming! As a result, It is likely to be very long and slightly disorganized as I attempt to record every stray thought that has occurred in relation to the topic since its conception. Its very unlikely that upon completion of this post that I will have adequately supported all my points and clearly expressed every thought, so please, feel free to question and debate because this will help me perfect my thought. As is always true, I will happily respond to any questions in relation to my writing. This Post was first conceived months ago during a sermon in which the pastor of our church emphasized Jesus' Great Commission in the New Testament, Matthew 28:19-20 Therefore go and make disciples of ALL nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. The translation of scripture our pastor was using read ALL PEOPLES, and those words in combination with the spiritual discussions (relating to the spiritual implications of homosexuality) that had recently been taking place between myself and an old college friend caused me to question, "What does ALL mean here, and as a church both locally and internationally, are we really committed to obeying this command that resounded from the vocal chords of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ? My challenge here is that ALL most certainly does indicate that no exclusion is to be made from those we reach out to in the name of Jesus in hopes that each individual will come to know Jesus personally and experience drastic , positive life-change as a result. My fear is that while the church as a whole has been faithful to reach out in such a way to many nations around the world, that it has much to the shame of the name and legacy of Christ failed to embrace certain people groups because of fear, ignorance, and misinterpretation of the scriptures. The one particular neglected people group over which my heart is bleeding today is the one comprised of individuals whose sexual orientation is outside God's original intention. In other words, I believe an accurate description of the church's reaction to homosexuals as a group has sadly, been more of a pushing away or casting aside as hopeless rather than the accepting embrace of Christ's love:( This saddens me because Christ teaches me in his scriptures that, no, the practice of homosexual behavior is not God honoring much like it teaches me that I should not steal, murder, lie, lust, or be greedy 1Timothy 1:8-10 We know that the law is good if one uses it properly. We also know that law is made not for the righteous but for lawbreakers and rebels, the ungodly and sinful the unholy and irreligious; for those who kill their fathers and mothers, for murderers, for adulterers and perverts, for slave traders and liars and perjurers-and for whatever else contrary to sound doctrine that conforms to the sound gospel of the blessed God, which he entrusted to me. The GOOD NEWS (gospel message) that I and every other card-carrying Christian has been commanded to share with ALL PEOPLE is that we are ALL sinners who have from time to time fallen into one or more of the previously mentioned sins, and that Jesus has already served the punishment for each and every one of those sins past, present, and future, and that ANYONE, straight, gay, black, white, or tan who chooses to receive that free and undeserved gift living from that point forward with Jesus as his/her Lord (Boss) and Savior is a child of God Most High and will live with him for eternity in Heaven! Right now, my Christian friends, who I believe to be good-intention are freaking out because they know the Bible teaches that homosexuality is a sin...blah, blah, blah, but what I need my dear, Christian friends to stop and consider is that each of us struggle with sin. In fact, some of us are more inclined toward certain sins than others, but none of us lives life free from temptation or sin. The Bible is incredibly clear on this issue Romans 3:23 For ALL have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace. Jesus was the only human being able to live a perfect life, thankfully, on our behalf, so that when he served the punishment for our sins, we could then benefit from his perfect life by having the privelage of wearing it as a perfect, holy, spotless cloak in God's presence since Jesus traded it in for our dirty rags on the cross Phillipians 3:9 ...not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ-the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith. My point in reiterating these basic Christian principles is that we (Christian, heterosexuals) are no different than homosexuals. Just as we are often tempted to do things that dishonor God, so are the individuals belonging to this specific group. Its just a different temptation than we experience as heterosexuals. Not worse or better just different. Remembering that even Jesus experienced temptation Luke 4: 1-2 Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit in the desert where for forty days he was tempted by the devil, I must point out that temptation in and of itself is not sinful or dishonoring to God in any way, so on that foundation I proclaim that desiring to have sexual relations with another individual of the same gender is NOT a sin! Desiring such a thing does not qualify one to be disowned or cast off by the church in any way, shape, or form. Now, having said that, I must also qualify that acting upon temptations to behave differently than God has directed in his word is sinful even though all sins have been covered by the blood of Jesus. the Bible instructs us not to take advantage of God's gift of forgiveness by freely sinning because we know the punishment has already been paid Galations 5:13 ...But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature...so I say, live by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. The acts of the sinful nature are obvious; sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery; idolotry, and witchcraft;hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish-ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkeness, orgies, and the like. I warn you as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. Christians both homo- and hetero- sexual, will be able to enter God's presence on the coattails of Christ's perfection. So, if you're gay and are still reading open-minded, I want to tell you from the bottom of my heart a truth that has been placed there by the hand of God himself...You are not a weirdo or unworthy of life or anything else you might feel about yourself because of the particular temptation with which you struggle! All human beings struggle with temptation to behave outside God's will in one way or another from time to time. In fact, the Bible puts us all in our place by saying in 1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God he is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you are able to bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. This scripture tells me that it is sadly inaccurate to believe yourself better or worse according to the type of temptation with which one struggles, but rather if a person is tempted by something, it is common to humanity, so the only way you could turn up as a weirdo or as abnormal is if you're comparing yourself to a pack of dogs, gaggle of geese, or a pod of whales! I'm sure you notice throughout this scripture the tone that more than suggests that one who wants to honor God by following Jesus and receive eternity in heaven with his/her life must flee temptation and do the very best he/she is able to refrain from whatever behavior that dishonors God in his life be it lying, gossiping, or engaging in sexual relations with an individual of the same sex, so my point really is that there is absolutely nothing wrong, in God's eyes, with desiring to have sex with a member of the same sex. A person should not have to be ashamed to admit to such anymore than I am ashamed to admit I have a propensity to be prideful, selfish, and greedy! A person should not be excluded from anything because of his/her temptation, and God wants you to become a follower of Jesus and spend eternity with him no matter what anyone else has told you or made you feel about him in reference to your sexual preference, but following Jesus would mean resisting the temptations with which you struggle, but I must clarify, it does not mean that you must stop being attracted to members of the same sex because that would be the same as someone telling me not to be tempted to share that juicy story I overheard the other day with my friend...its impossible for me to prevent the temptation from occurring because the only thing I truely have control over is how I respond to said temptation! The temptation is not the sin! Just know that thousands of years ago, Jesus made a special provision to include ALL people in his family, so if someone in the church tries to belittle or exclude you, shame on them because he/she is totally misrepresenting Christ's original intention! It makes me SOoo sad to hear in the news today that another young man took his life because he was so ashamed for his sexual-orientation to be revealed to the world. We are guilty for allowing the world that this particular young man once lived in to communicate to him that struggling with the homosexual temptation should be a death sentence! As Christians, we need to be sure we aren't helping to perpetuate the falsehood that the desire to have sexual relations with an individual of the same sex is somehow a sin in itself by which the value of the individual experiencing the temptation is diminished creating an environment that often imposes a death sentence on these individuals whom God created in his image and loves dearly just like the rest of his creation!

Going All The Way With God

2010-09-17T14:19:00.000-07:00

First Annual Love-Your-Enemy Day 9/11/10

2010-09-10T15:30:00.000-07:00

Matthew 5:43 and 44 You have heard that it was said, "Love your neighbor and hate you enemy." But I[Jesus] tell you: LOVE your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.

These words rolled off the lips of my beloved Lord and Savior Jesus Christ in the middle of one of his most famous, breathtakingly beautiful sermons, so I was completely confused and horrified yesterday when I learned through a news report that an individual in FL who claims to bear the name of Christ was attacking the Islamic faith by inviting his congregation to attend and participate in a ceremonial burning of copies of the Koran on the anniversary of the infamous World Trade Center terrorist attack. I do not know this man's private motivations, but it seems by the timing and nature of the event that he is acting in poorly aimed retaliation against the men who orchestrated these attacks. Now, I say, "poorly aimed," because he seems to be attacking any and everyone sharing the terrorist's proclaimed faith. I'm confident that, much like this situation, one or two strangely radical personalities in the Islamic faith acted on 9/11/01 without the support or consent of every or any other practicing Muslim! Its sad when the one looney in the bunch does something completely unrepresentative of the group to get recognized by the rest of the world! I fear that just as the poor choices and destorted reasoning of those few terrorists have become, for some, the face of Islam that the unbiblical actions of this one man proclaiming to be a minister of Christ will tarnish the already terribly misrepresented name of Christ Jesus! Anyway, what I want you to know is that Jesus doesn't want us to react to the persecution heaped on our country by teorrists in the past with hate, but rather, love and prayer! Now, folks, that's a biblical response, so what does love for your enemies look like in this situation? I guess it depends who you feel has become your enemy as a result of the events of 9/11/01. If as this minister in FL seems to feel, anyone who practices the Muslim faith fits that description, something as simple as picking up the litter you notice on the lawn of a local mosque might be considered a loving, Christ-honoring action, but for me, I would need to go so far as track down the families of the men who crashed those planes and help fill the gaps whether emotional, spiritual, or financial that have been left in their lives since the deaths of their sons, husbands, and fathers. Since this action is neither practical or logical, after having spoken with a minister at my church, I am considering participation to some extent in the Dearbourne, MI ministry project that strives to minister in all the above mentioned areas to the largest Muslim population in the United States, but I commit to praying for those men's families in an intentional and direct act of love for those terrorists themselves! Those words would catch in my throat if I were speaking them aloud because that is so against my human nature, but I love Christ, and he has called me to love my enemies and pray for those who persecute me, so I will if only for the sake of representing him well to the world around me!:) My commitment to honoring Christ in not only my actions, but also, the attitudes of my heart leads me to proclaim that for my family 9/11 will always and forever be Love-Your-Enemies Day instead of my original thought Love-A-Muslim Day. I don't want the focus to be on Muslims specifically because I feel that identifying the religion as a whole as our enemy is dangerous and inaccurate, and I feel that Love-Your -Enemies gets to the heart of my original thought and intention. I want my Lili to always know how important it is to Jesus that she practice this behavior no matter how counter to her human nature it runs, so tomorrow celebrate with my family Love-Your-Enemies Day and take the time to examine your heart to the point that you are able to identify any people or groups that you classify as enemies or persecutors and take time to pray for them and intentionally love on them!:) Please, pass this thought along to all you know!:)

Roller Coaster Religion

2010-09-07T08:21:00.000-07:00

The Labor Day weekend found me in a couple situations during which I was able to observe people of all ages riding roller coasters of all sizes. First, at Holiday World, a small theme park in southern Indiana that offers some of the world's best wooden coasters and second, at a local Labor Day carnival near our home. As I watched the riders I saw varied responses to the danger and excitement the rides presented. Some threw their hands into the air with great abandon hoping to heighten the exhileration of flying down a steep hill embracing the belly-thieving feeling of lost control, while others, clung to the seat with white knuckles having boarded the ride just to say they had or to placate their pleading companions. These pictures reminded me of the scene I have viewed on many a weekend at evangelical Christian churches during the group worship time. Some throw their hands in the air with great abandon reaching out to God and saying, "I'm all in. Take me on a spiritual adventure while others clutch the pew in front of them with white knuckles as they inch away from the obviously crazy holy-roller beside them who must be experiencing a hallucination during which she is headed down a steep hill on a roller coaster with her hands extended high into the air. In this same pew is another individual who raises her hands only so she isn't the only one who isn't. I mean, she doesn't want to appear to be a heathen in the presence of all these saints who seem to be so much closer to God than herself, and next to her is standing a person who raises her hands simply to portray that she is a saint although she knows that if anyone had seen her interacting with her family before church he would have known otherwise. This post is not about whether you ever raise your hands in worship or not because, honestly, as this scenario makes obvious, the raising of hands during a worship song during weekend services can reflect several different spiritual motivations some sincere and others not so much, only God and the individual who owns said hands knows which motivation is behind the supposedly worshipful posture, so I mention my roller coaster observations to ask you not, "what is your posture during worship songs, but what is your posture as you live your life?" Do you live your life as the first person in the pew embracing God's will for your life as if it were your own, fully submitted to abandoning the desires of your flesh in a manner that, at times, is terrifying to both you and those around you, or do you cling white knuckled to your own desires like my Lili did on her first and second solo ride on the kiddie, dragon roller coaster at the Labor day carnival, but I did notice that she relaxed a little with each lap around the track as if her mounting experience gradually convinced her that she was safe even though it felt scary and that if she allowed herself to fully enjoy every aspect of the experience it could be completely amazing and breathtakingly enjoyable:) I relate to her experience in my spiritual life as stated in 1 Peter 2:2 Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation now that you have tasted that the Lord is good. The second part of this verse is where I draw a connection to Lili's roller coaster experience. Once we taste and see that the Lord is good we begin to trust and adore him in a whole new way that allows us to assume a posture of complete disregard for ourselves before him! When we obey God even when his advice doesn't make sence to us, we find out that His wisdim, his advice, his intentions, are GOOD, and it becomes a little easier for us to relax into allowing him to fill the role of LORD of our lives, which in all honesty, is the spirit's true equivalent of throwing your hands in the air in worship. God doesn't care what you do with your hands when you sing songs to him, but he is intimately invested in the posture of our spirits as we live our lives, so ask yourself, "Am I holding white-knuckled onto aspects of my life in an attempt to maintain full control, or do I daily throw my figurative hands in the air in total submission to God's will for my life?" If you don't know, here's a test for you to measure your true level of submission to God's authority in your life. Read Matthew 5:39-41 But I [Jesus] tell you, do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who asks you, do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. Now, before you bust your computer monitor tryng to reach through the screen to strangle me for these words I have typed, stop to consider that these are the recorded words from the good and holy lips of Jesus Christ, you know, the one, you likely say is Lord of your life if you label yourself a Christian, so why do these words irritate us so and raise our hackles? I really don't need you to answer that question because I am well aware of the answer from my own personal reaction that the thought of living life this way makes me feel vulnerable and unprotected and likely to end up as the world's doormat, and then, my question for myself is, "Why, Cori?" You have tasted and seen that the Lord is good! You have story after story that you share through your writing and speech that ooze with praise and commendations for the yumminess(beyond goodness) of living life with Jesus Christ as Lord (Boss), so why do you question him here on whether he knows what he's talking about in these scary potentially hurtful situations? What does this reveal concerning how submitted you truely are to him? You've experienced that life Christ's way is AWESOME as you have pried one white-knuckle loose at a time, and with each freed finger you KNOW the ride that life is just got BETTER and BETTER and BETTER and BETTER, so why not just let go COMPLETELY and stand before the Lord with both hands raised in complete submission to his will and make it possible to experience the heightened enjoyment and excitement of riding hands-free? I'm sharing my deepest thoughts with you here in hopes that it will get you thinking deeply about your own walk with Christ because I truely have tasted and seen that the Lord is excellent, and I totally think its worth it to follow his advice in everything even when its scary because from my personal experience it ALWAYS leads to blessing and joy beyond compare!:)
Another observation that stands out to me as I consider the experience I had over the weekend is that as I stood among the throng that had formed near the roller coaster entrance at a location that offered a good vantage point of some of the rides most frightening assests, I couldn't help but overhear the conversations of those around me that reflected admiration for the members of their group who had chosen to ride, and maybe even, a little regret that they hadn't joined them. Another common thread to the conversations was a recognition of the fun the riders wer having and possibly a little vicarious enjoyment as well:) I couldn't help but wonder why these individuals didn't just get in line and ride, so they could experience the fun for themselves. In sharing this, I am further extending Jesus' oringinal invite by inviting you to join me in enjoying life in a committment to FULL submission to Jesus Christ. Please, don't just stand and watch me enjoy the ride wishing you could experience it also!

Strike A Pose!

2010-09-02T07:23:00.000-07:00

In my absence from writing the past several weeks I have started a diet on which I have already dropped 8+ pounds. Knowing my husband is the most honest, straight-forward person that God placed on this earth, I dared to strike a pose this mornig right before stepping into the shower while questioning him in a sing-song little girl voice, "Am I skinny yet?" Not surprisingly, just as I had hoped, he answered honestly, "You're skinnier than you were!" Why am I pleased with this answer that implies I'm still on the wrong side of chubby with more than a few pounds to go before my ideal weight will be attained? Because I know, just as I am sure you do, that weight loss is a process that requires time and effort. One doesn't miraculously drop from nearly 200 pounds to 150 with the first sip of Coke Zero! I am pleased that my husband recognized a noticeable and measurable difference in my size and shape this morning although I am well aware that I haven't yet met my goal! As I was completing my morning routine my stroke-ravaged brain made a connection from that incident to a moment that occurred during yet another new development since the last time I wrote. Yesterday, I began teaching/leading a women's Bible study entitled, "Living Victoriously In Difficult Times." During the introductory lesson, we began an overview of the spiritual benchmarks or milestones I have identified from personal experience that are necessary to have reached in order to be victorious when life stinks. By definition, benchmark and milestone are both words that describe a marker that identifies a specific distance traveled on a journey. In order to progress on said journey, one must pass the progressive milestones to reach a further location. Just as I must lose 10 pounds before I can boast having lost 50, I must grow in my relationship with God through Jesus Christ past certain understandings in order to experience true VICTORY in life no matter the circumstance. Making spiritual progress requires discipline and effort just as progressing in a weight loss program does. While abstaining from fatty and sugar-filled yum-yums seems to be the key attaining my goal weight, gorging on God's word and regularly enjoying ooey-gooey, sweet time in God's presence through prayer, worship and fellowship with other believers are key to spiritual growth. I share this because sometimes we can become discouraged and even question our salvation when we witness other Christians who are farther down the road with God, and once again, just as in weight loss, it not really about where you are but instead about whether you are making recognizable progress on your spiritual journey or not, so strike a pose before the most honest person you know and ask, "Do you see a difference in me? Do I look more like Jesus (our behavioral and spiritual goal as Christians)?" On this note, I remember watching the minister at our church as a teenager and thinking, "That's what I want! I want to love God with that intensity, passion, dedication, and committment! Well, today as a 30 -year-old woman who still treasures that minister and his family, knowing intimately who I was as a teenager, I know I have progressed farther and farther along the path to those characteristics I admired in his spirit...spiritually, I am a different size and shape than I was, and although I have not finished my journey and there is still room for plenty of growth, I am near to giddy over the results I see, so I will continue seeking to grow in the Lord as long as I live, and one day, when I get the privelage of finally meeting Jesus(and not a second before!) I will finally be made perfect (completely reflecting Jesus in everyway). I find this comparison of weight loss and spiritual growth interesting because one is about losing and shrinking while the other is about gaining everything and growing while both are important to health and quality of life (just in different areas). Take some time to evaluate your spiritual progress once in awhile just as you might step on the scale or ask your husband's opinion occassionally when you are dieting to evaluate how you are doing and determine if you need to make a change in your program. If you don't have a brutally honest individual in your life to ask, dig into God's word because as 2 Timothy 3: 16 says All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness, so the man of God may be thouroughly equipped for every good work. Sounds like the equilvalent to a spiritual scale to me!:D Another glowing recommendation for God's word as a tool for spiritual growth is found in Hebrews 4:12 For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

If you are curious about the spiritual milestones I eluded to early on in this post, you are welcome to join me next Wednesday at Crossroads Christian Church in Evansville, IN for my class which is part of a larger women's ministry called Daughter's of the King (DOK). The program in its entirety runs from 9AM-11AM with my class portion beginning at 10AM being preceeded by a large group worship and learning time. One can pre-register at www.crossroadschristian.com. Child care is provided, so no excuses;)

Color Crayon Doctrine

2010-07-11T20:29:00.000-07:00

My quickly approaching four-year-old daughter posed a befuddling question to me this afternoon, "Cori (yes, she likes to call me by name), why do grown-ups color in the lines?" Upon considering her query, I was tempted to respond with, "because it makes a prettier picture," but then it quickly occurred to me that my daughter's colorful and carefree expressions, which most would interpret as scribbles, often can be described as beautiful and engaging, so I stopped short of responding anything more than, "I don't know!" In fact, I immediately began to question whether instructing our children to color inside the lines might unintentionally squelch their individuality, so maybe, I wondered, "Is it bad for our children or wrong to inhibit them in such a way?" Of course, I had to follow our short conversation with a facebook post to flaunt my adorable, genious and elicit some opinions from my friends concerning the coloring conundrum in which I now found myself! One comment in particular got the few undamaged brain cells that remain after my stroke to firing, and they haven't cooled since. Basically, my friend suggested that coloring in the lines is neither right nor wrong good nor bad, but just a simple way for a child to learn self-discipline, which appealed to my understanding of life just as much as my initial, maybe, there's not any value to training a child to stay in the lines like everyone else other than stifling their creativity and creating a little conformist. Neither of which appealed to me as a goal I want to acheive in my parenting career. Anyway, my mind connected from here to the concept of living inside the boundaries that God has established for our safety, which I have blogged about previously. We are all likely aware that God has set forth certain guidelines, boundaries, commandments, or rules in his written word, the Bible. Much like we as parents set rules for our children to protect them because we love them, God sets the boundaries for our physical, emotional, and spiritual safety as we live here on this earth. It is my belief that choosing to live within these established lines although it requires a great deal of self-dscipline allows us to avoid many of the consequential hardships and tradgedies that we often note others experiencing. Often, wondering why God wants to keep us from the apparent fun on the other side, we are tempted to cross over and soon learn from what exactly our loving father wanted to protect us! caused us. Just like my daughter's coloring pages, at first, the activity going on outside the lines looks enjoyable and exciting, and we may even feel cheated or stifled by keeping inside the boundary lines God established, but we soon learn that life outside the lines is messy and confusing and not nearly as attractive or fun as it first seemed, but by no means does this imply that we cannot color/live with great passion, exuberance, and creativity within the healthy and safe boundaries that God has established, so commit today to making your life a lovely, colorful, and creative picture colored by you just for God that he can hang on his refrigerator with pride and delight when you hand it over to him when you're finished, and remember, for your own enjoyment along the way color with exuberance INSIDE the lines he has established to protect you!:) Also, if it is your desire to carefully color inside the lines of the picture your life is, it might be wise to familiarize yourself with the boundaries God has established by reading his word regularly because you might be surprised by how easy it is to unwittinly scribble in some areas of life when we get distracted by the ever changing views and opinions of the world around us!

Garden of Weedin'- An Apologetic Blogger's Excuse

2010-07-06T20:51:00.000-07:00

I have been dreadfully absent from my blog since summer began, and I have an excuse and an apology for you because of it!:) As the first warm rays of sun kissed the earth to announce spring and ready the soil for seeds a plan was birthed in my heart and mind from my home's desperate need for landscaping and my heart's equally desperate need to proclaim my love and gratitude to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, for sustaining me in the storms of life in the most miraculous ways that have allowed me to truely experience LIFE, yes, an all-caps life in spite of tragic circumstamces! During the Easter holiday, I was reminded of an old hymn I had learned in my childhood entitled Because He Lives. Its lyrics say, " (vs. 1) God sent his son, they called him, Jesus; he came to love, heal, and forgive; he lived and died to buy my pardon, an empty grave is there to prove my Savior lives. (chorus) Because he lives, I can face tomorrow; because he lives, all fear is gone; because I know he holds the future, and life is worth the living just because he lives. (vs. 2) How sweet to hold a newborn baby, and feel the pride and joy he gives but greater still the calm assurance, this child can face uncertain days because he lives. ( repeat chorus) (vs. 3) And then one day I'll cross the river; I'll fight life's final war with pain; and then as death gives way to victory, I'll see the lights of glory and I'll know he reigns. Anyway, this hymn took on such personal meaning to me as I celebrated the Easter holiday, and I became more and more aware that the LIFE I had the privelage of living was solely in all-caps because of the relationship I have with God only through Christ Jesus because he overcame my sin's punishment (death on the cross and separation from God) by raising from the dead that first Easter morning and establishing the possibility for me to LIVE my life in the peaceful, joy-filled presence of my creator, and folks, this realization spurred me on to dedicate the flower and vegetable gardens that have been devouring all my time since the onset of spring to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ in order to establish a means of daily remembrance of the fact I get to LIVE life courtesy of him and the joy, peace, and contentment he funnels into my life with no regard for circumstance! As a result, the Because He Lives Memorial Gardens, which require a great deal of time and effort to maintain even though it is only 75% complete was estabished on the grounds surrounding my home. My sincere attitude of joy and thanksgiving requires me to make such a huge tado because I recall a time before God's healing had touched my soul when I had thoughts like, " I wish everyone would stop making such a big deal about surviving a stroke because its really nothing to be happy about because I'd rather have died than have to live like this, " and "Its handicrapped not handicapped because this is a load of crap!" I hope that gets a WOW response out of you in comparison to the current state of my spirit once I gave God a chance to do his thing in my heart! I was near suicidal, in fact, I can remember half-heartedly considering slipping beneath the bubbley water in the tub once just to end the daily struggle I experience, but now, with God's healing touch only possible through Jesus Christ, I sincerely love my life and embrace my disability...THAT'S A MIRACLE, and I am sorry that my desire to celebrate that miracle through the hobby of gardening has kept me from my writing ministry for several weeks. Although my tribute garden is a fountain, two benches, a swing, a flag pole, several rose bushes, and various decorative finishing touches away from completion, it serves its purpose as a daily, visual reminder of the healing of mind, body and spirit for which I am eternally grateful! I hope to post some pictures as soon as I can figure out how to do it, so you can see it yourself and watch my garden's progress toward completion:) Just so you know, I am hoping to arrange a couple of areas for Bible study and reflection within the flower section of my garden, hence the need for benches and the swing. One such area is to have a fountain reminiscent of the one in a garden at the Rehabilitation Institute where I spent a month after my stroke and before my heart surgery. Near the cite for that fountain is already planted a weeping pussy-willow tree representative of the mourning that took place immediately following the tragedy. This was flanked on both sides by a plant named bleeding heart to symbolize my heart surgery. Unfortunately, I have already killed both of these:/ I hope to replace them with roses as soon as finances allow! Although not planned, how appropriate because God took my bleeding heart and replaced it with the beautiful, sweet fragrance of joy and peace! My point tonight, once again, is God is awesome, and not only desires your love and devotion, but fully deserves it!:) I face tomorrow and everyday of my disabled future with peace, hope and joy instead of fear, disappointment, and bitterness, so I sing at the top of my lungs, "[only] because he lives, I can face tomorrow! Because he lives, all fear is gone! Because I know he holds my future...my life is worth the living just because he lives!"

Who Is Douglas Adams?

2010-05-21T09:34:00.000-07:00

Human beings,

who are almost unique in having

the ability to learn from the experience of others,

are also remarkable for their apparent

disinclination to do so. -Douglas Adams

Last weekend the sermon offered by our minister was one laiden with historical fact that I am sure to relay incorrectly, but I need to express a point from the sermon, so I will try to do so without falsely representing history, and I apologize in advance if I do. Well, evidentally, we have come to a point in the Old Testament during which God's people are divided into two separate nations, Judah to the north and Israel to the south, and over a period of time both nations failed to honor God and therefore didn't experience his blessing and support leading to miserable captivity in the end. Well, according to our pastor the northern nation was more advanced in reaching this point allowing the southern nation the opportunity to witness the results of living outside God's will as a nation, and the very good question that was raised asked, "Why did they not learn from the example of their northern neighbor and alter their path accordingly? Anyway, following this lesson striking a chord in my heart, I ran accross this quote from whoever Douglas Adams is, and I realized these two parallel teachings, if you allow them to be true for you, could nullify the usefulness of my writing altogether because, I write in hopes that someone, anyone will recognize the great treasure I have found in a relationship with God through Jesus Christ, which is available not exclusively to me, and accordingly follow my example of living life to the tune of Jesus' teachings found in the Bible! Anyway, my point in this particular blog is to say, "please see what beauty and joy exists in my life in spite of circumstance as a direct result of my committment to follow Jesus, and don't be like Israel and totally miss your opportunity to avoid the disaster that life is without him by joining me in following him today if you haven't already!" Join me in taking note of the examples from which we are intended to learn and choosing to do just that...learn and live accordingly:)

Risky Business

2010-05-21T08:09:00.000-07:00

The longer I am a parent, the more amazed and thankful I am for my Father-in- Heaven's eternal patience, grace, and mercy! As my 3-year-old whinily explains over and over in what she considers sound logic why she just CANNOT do what I have asked of her even though, I her loving parent have never steered her wrong, she just refuses to trust my advice and obey, anyway, as this all occurs and my patience wears thin to the point of insanity, I wonder how often I have done just the same thing to God, and after experiencing how completely annoying it is, I am totally humbled and amazed by his never-tiring, perfect patience! Let's share, what has God been asking of you for days maybe even years that you have been resisting because you, in your "sound logic" just know you will get hurt or embarassed? Is it forgiving and trusting someone who has hurt you in the past? I heard on the radio yesterday that the Christian life is risky, and yes, it does seem that way when we follow God's leading for our lives blindly, but I guarentee you its riskier to go your own way because our creator loves us, and knowing everything about everything uses his wisdom concerning us and our environment to lead us to the most desirable existence possible, so when we ignore him in order to avoid risk, we actually risk missing out on the peaceful, joy-filled existence he wants to lead us to, so I challenge you to risk it all, practice blind-faith, and enjoy God's blessing of peace and joy on your life!

Ashley's Post

2010-05-19T11:42:00.000-07:00

In a conversation with a friend yesterday concerning a hurtful situation her daughter was having to face, it came up that as parents we can't, as much as we may wish to, protect our children from everything, and as I have rolled the conversation around in my mind since it has occurred to me that, no, we can't, but be encouraged that, yes, we can equip them for everything, which brings me to writing on the topic of the Mother's Day speech I presented a few weekends ago at Alfordsville Christian Church. It begins with a scripture with which you are likely very familiar especially if you've been following along with this blog. If fact, I used it in my last post Matthew 7:24-27 in this passage Jesus is concluding a very challenging sermon including teachings that run totally contrary to our human nature, but he insists that if we want to love God with our lives we must live totally contrary to our human nature doing things like when someone has taken your tunic give him your cloak also and if someone forces you to go one mile, go two! Well, after blowing everyone's mind with these mind-shattering teachings, he says,"therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on the sand The rain came down, the streams rose and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash. Well, this is the key to equipping your child to not only survive but flourish in any tradgedy, disaster, or unfotunate event or circunstance she might encounter in the course of her life, and for the purpose of proving its validity, I must say that I am living proof that an individual whose life is firmly established on the foundation of Jesus's teaching stands in the storm no matter how strong the winds blow or how high the flood waters rise, and I give credit to my parents for helping me in the initial stages of building that foundation, so although they were unable to prevent me from suffering a stroke at age 28 only to survive with potentially life-altering disability, they were faithful to equip me for whatever life might bring my way by introducing me to Jesus and setting an example of the importance of living life by his teaching! So parents, take heart, it may be scary to send your kiddos out into the world/future not knowing what it holds for them while being completely aware that you cannot protect them from whatever challenges they will face, but you can prepare them to stand in the storms of life by introducing them to Jesus and encouraging them to put his teaching into practice in their lives.
The most effective way to teach them how to do this is by setting an example by doing it in your own life! For example, if your boss is giving you a hard time at work and you have vocalized this during the dinner conversation, before bedtime prayers pull out the scriptures and read Matthew 5:44 Unfortunately, I cannot type it out for you exactly because this page of my Bible has been torn out, so I will paraphrase, and you can check to make sure I'm correct later:) It says, " pray for those who persecute you!" After reading this scripture you could ask your child to pray with you for your boss as dificult as it may be explaining that it doesn't necessarily make sense to you, but you know that following Jesus' teachings no matter how crazy they seem is a way to tell God we love him, and since Jesus loves us so much, we know he would never give us any kind of advice other than that which is best for us and will lead to the best quality of life possible! This example could also be used more directly if your child is being bullied personally by praying together for the bully accompanied by a similar conversation. Obviously, in order to parent this way, it would be necessary to familiarize one's self with Jesus' teachings by reading and studying the Bible, which is also an excellent activity in which to include your school-aged child...I have attempted it with my 3-year-old, and although I still find it a valuable experience for her, as could be expected, we don't accomplish much:) These are both reminiscent of methods that were used to assist me in establishing my life's foundation on Jesus's teachings...thanks mom and dad! Anyway, you may not have the money to leave your child a huge inheritance or pay her way through college, etc, but you are completely capable of providing her with a spiritual inheritance that will enrich every area of her life forever and provide stability that will ensure she will stand in the storms of life. I must qualify here that, ultimately, It is a child's personal decision whether he or she will continue building her life on the foundation of Jesus' teachings and be a fully-committed follower of Jesus as she grows and lives her life, but the power of a parent's influence and example cannot be rivaled, and wouldn't it please you to see your 28 year-old daughter stand not only strong and resilient, but also joyful, peaceful, and contented in a collosal storm from which you were unable to protect her knowing that she is standing due to your faithfulness to pass on the great inheritance of your faith, and in a way, you did protect her from the GREAT CRASH Jesus spoke of at the end of 27 in the previously mentioned scripture:) Oh, and I have to add that if you know you neglected this aspect of parenting as your children grew, it is never too late to influence your children for Christ! As a mother or father of grown children, you can choose to make Jesus your Lord and Savior today, so you can effectively set an example of following Christ from now on that they will be sure to notice and be influenced by...parenting is a life-long endeavor!:) Here's to living for Jesus and equipping our children for all that life is today and will be tomorrow!

Storm Shelter

2010-05-18T09:03:00.000-07:00

If you have been following my posts, you may have noticed that I particularly moved by Jesus's use of the figurative storm in his teaching particularly in Matthew 7:24-27 where he details the story of the wise and foolish builders and how their houses weather the storm in direct relation to the builder's choice of foundation. Last Thursday during my morning quite time I came accross another scripture in Mark 4:35-41 referencing a storm that spoke to my heart of God's greatness. That day when evening came, he said to his disciples, " Let us go over to the other side." Leaving the crowd behind, they took him along, just as he was,in the boat. There were also other boats with him. A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, "Teacher, don't you care if we drown?" He got up rebuked the wind and said to the waves, "Quiet! Be Still!" Then the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to his disciples, "Why are you afraid?" Do you still have no faith?" They were terrified and asked each other, "Who is this?" Even the wind and waves obey him!" In this situation Jesus actually responded to his follower's concern by ending the storm that was troubling them, and I agree that his ability to do this is awesome, but i want to go even further by saying that I find his ability to draw us into the stern with him to curl up next to his secure warmth while the storm rages around us is an even mightier display of his power! I learned during the fierces storm I have incountered in my life so far that my God is so GREAT that he doesn't even need to calm the storm to bring me peace. He is so powerful that he can calm my fears in the midst of calamity, and having experienced the delight of curling up on the restful cushion with him while storm rages, I wouldn't have it any other way! Yes, being that the storm still raged, I sustained damages from the beating it gave, but even in that God has healed my heart and soul to the point of acceptance. Now, that is a powerful God that can turn memories of a nightmare into sweet, sweet dreams and what could have been bitterness and disappointment into beauty and destiny:) So I quote Jesus, "Why are you afraid?" He is awesomely powerful, able, and willing to take miserable circunstances and transform them into marvelous blessings! Rest with Jesus on the cushion in the stern while the storm rages! Yes, he could quiet the storm, but how muvh more awesome it id that he can quiet our fears, anger, bitterness, and disappointment during the storm! My God is an AWESOME God!

VOICE OF TRUTH with lyrics

2010-05-03T09:43:00.000-07:00

Avalon - The Greatest Story

2010-04-28T12:24:00.000-07:00

Free To Be Me

2010-04-27T20:49:00.000-07:00

I was driving Lili to the eye doctor yesterday when the previously posted song "Free To Be Me" by Francesca Battistelli came on te radio, and it was love at first sound because for as long as I can remember I have depended on God to free me from the bonds of peer and societal pressure as I moved through this life as an awkward and imperfect girl/young lady/woman. I can still remember the encouraging self-talk speeches I gave myself before incidences of public speaking, or walking through the hallways with a heinous zit on my face,"God loves you just the way you are, and he's the only one that matters!" This empowering, over-coming statement is true for all of us. As simplistic as this thought is my belief in it is the foundation from which I face each day as a awkward, imperfect, and noticably disabled 30- year-old woman today. I won't deny that there are unfortunate moments when I get a glimpse of myself through the lens most the world likely uses to view me, and I feel incapable and useless, but in these moments God picks me up, places me on his shoulders, and reminds me that he loves and values me just the way I am, and through him I have a productive future. How can I but love a God like that!? 2 Corinthians 4:7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard-pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down , but not destroyed. We are weak vessels like jars of clay that contain the treasure of Jesus, and our weaknesses makes us more desirable to use in God's eyes because when we are able to arise victorious from the ashes of life in our weakened state, everyone who witnesses it has to know it was from no power of our own, so they are forced to question then,"Who?" This line of thought opens the door for God to say, "Me," and just like that our weakness proves useful for the creator of the universe. If you are weak today, don't view yourself from the world's perspective, but rather peek through the hopeful and clear lens of God into the productive and purposeful future he wants to give you as you walk along side him borrowing his strength, and as you walk hold your head high and claim those dents! They are a beautiful, interesting, and unique part of you..the you God adores:) Francesca Battistelli refers to them as dents in her fender, but I preder storm damage in my case, since much of my weakness is damage sustained in the storms of my life, but whatever we call them, let's see our weaknesses through God's eyes as useful attributes rather than deficiencies! The most encouraging words I heard on a down day during my previously mentioned storm were, "Don't consider your disability a subtraction from who you were, but rather an addition to who you are,"- Cheryl Smith, OT (I love you, Cheryl!) so if you are weakened by physical or emotional disability or just character flaws, see your weaknesses for what they really are attributes that ADD to the person you are if you team up with God in this life and allow his strength to work through you:)

Francesca Battistelli - Free To Be Me

2010-04-27T20:48:00.000-07:00

Don't Be A Hater

2010-04-22T06:02:00.000-07:00

Despite the influence of my union-minded father, I have never been too ingrossed by politics. Mostly political talk bores and irritates me much like the Obama-smear-campaign I have witnessed taking place bit-by-bit on facebook, not that he's attempting to smear anyone, but he's getting smeared and what irritates me is that in some haphazard, ridiculous manner its being done in the name of Christ. Evidentally, some supposed Christ-followers are so inscensed over Obama's stance on certain moral and ethical issues that they feel the need to twist and contort half truths into total untruths in an attempt to defame our current president. An anti-Obama post that was being passed around last week alerted me to this unfortunate political measure. It stated that Obama had canceled the National Day of Prayer and expressed great displeasure that Obama was supposedly trampling on the religious rights of Christians in this country. I was tempted to repost it because as a lover of Christ myself, the wording and accusations raised my hackles a little, but something caused me to pause and question the validity of the statement, so off to www.snopes.com I did go to find that the entire claim was bogus. In fact, any truth that existed in the words of the posts were twisted bits and pieces of misunderstood and unrelated non-events. Call me naieve, but the idea that a person would tell complete lies to anger the public against another human-being dumbfounded me, and the underlying tone that this individual was angry because Obama had offended her Christianity frustrated me because I truely love Christ, and do not desire for him to be midrepresented in such a way because down the road when an unbeliever realizes what has happened, he will fault Christ as not being who he said he was when it would never have been Jesus' desire to lie about or to disrespect the President of the United States in such a way whether he supported his views or not. I'm not attempting to sway anyone to become an Obama supporter because as I earlier stated, I don't do politics and know very little of what he intends to accomplish as President, but I do hope to encourage my Christian brothers and sisters to refrain from being haters because that poorly represents Christ to the public! If you doubt my doctrine here, check out these scriptures: Romans 13: 1-2,6-7 Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority exept that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgement on themselves. This is also why you pay taxes, for the authorities are God's servants, who give their full time to governing. Give everyone what you owe him: if you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor. So, what, then, are we to do when we disagree with our governing leaders? This, I find beautiful being that all this hulabaloo was over the National Day of Prayer, read Matthew 5:44 But I [Jesus] tell you: love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. I expect to see and hear all my fellow lovers and followers of Jesus Christ respecting, honoring, and praying for Barack Obama on the very uncanceled National day of prayer(May 6th).

I hope this does not come off too snarky because such an attitude doesn't honor God either. We are all, most definitely, including me susceptible to getting caught up in waves of our humanity. What I mean by that is that it is an entirely normal human reaction to get into a fighting stance when you feel something you love and cherish is being threatened, and having a leader in place who does not necessarily share our moral and ethical views seems to be such a situation, but if we truely want to honor and love God with our lives, we often must fight against those waves of humanity with the strength that Christ provides in order to behave in obedience and respect to God's word.

Join me in showing the world who Christ really is by living out as well as speaking out the word of God!:)

God Didn't Ferberize Me!

2010-03-24T21:04:00.001-07:00

I have mentioned many times that God is my author/teacher/parent hero because he is the ultimate clinician in each of these practices as well as every other. In this post I will be focusing on God as a parent. Just because of who he is I know he is the epitome of perfection in parenting, so from the very beginning of my parenting experience, I have paused in perplexing moments and asked myself, "How does God parent me in similar instances?"Because whether we want to admit it or not there is nothing our children can do that isn't something for which a "similar instance" for comparison doesn't exist;) Yes, I am admitting that at times I behave as if I am no more spiritually mature than a 3-year-old, so my experience with God's handling of my behavior becomes a reference point as I raise my daughter on many occassions. One such occassion leads me to explain to you why my ever-growing 3-year-old daughter shares a bed with her parents in spite of the blatant disapproval of her pediatrician and many others. Lili slept in her crib long past the whole SIDS risk had been outgrown, but at 10 months after just that many nights of getting up 15-20 times a night to nurse her back to sleep, I decided I wanted to get some rest, so I called up Dr. Bob, Lili's very experienced and highly recommended pediatrician to inquire how I should go about addressing the issue at which time I was given a thourough explanation of the Ferber Method. A method I had refused to even consider in the past but was ready to try in the present, but after enduring the motherly turmoil of hearing her baby cry and not being able to respond for a day and a half, I threw in the towel admitting that I could already see it working but denying sleep was worth the cost of training my child like a dog that she couldn't trust me to come when she called, so she might as well shut-up and go back to sleep! This brought me to one of those earlier mentioned moments of perplextion, and I got to thinking that God had never done that to me, so I followed my heart, ran to my child the next time she cried out to me apologizing for being such a dim-wit of a momma, and carried her to a place of love and comfort until the night had passed...just like my Heavenly Daddy does for me when I cry out to him! Ever since my Lili Rose has been welcome to rest in that place until the day she chooses to sleep in her own bed...even if it takes a little bribery...I slept with my parents until the 2nd grade according to my baby book, and I clearly remember my father offering me $1 for every night I made it in my own bed. I was ready at that point, so the offer was all it took to tearlessly break me of what many consider a bad habit...as if looking to your parents for comfort and security should ever be considered a bad habit! I want to clarify that I am not trying to make anyone who has successfully or unsuccessfully used the Ferber Method feel like a bad parent. We do the best we can with what we've got, and this is simply a description of what that looked like in a specific scenario for me, and once again, we lack the perfection that God possesses, so even if we were to look to his example in every situation, we would be sure to fail in one way or another...the great thing is our inperfection is known and supplied for by him and any scars we leave in our children's hearts by our mistakes, he can heal! Another disclaimer is required here....I'm soooo not saying to parent willy-nilly since God is able to clean up your mess!...Just do your best and don't stress too much when you mess up because he's got your back, and if your not sure he does, tell him you want a relationship with him through the forgiveness Jesus (who you believe in and trust) offered you by paying the punishment for your sins on the cross, and start living with Jesus as the Lord of your life right now...for instructions on how to go about that, read the Bible;) By the way, Jesus set a Biblical example of following such a decision with a swim better known as baptism by emersion, so CANON BALL! Love you all and sweet dreams, say your prayers, and don't let the bed bugs bite...night-night;)

David vs. Goliath

2010-03-22T20:44:00.000-07:00

For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. 2 Chronicles 16:19

My most recent studies as I have been writing the curriculum for my churches youth have been about a young shepard boy named David, the least of his brothers, who was annointed to be the king of Israel after Saul had lost the kingdom in conjunction with losing sight of God. God is clear that he chose David singularly because of the condition of his heart. "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at outward apppearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7 Later, David steps up with gynormous faith to face a giant named Goliath who no one else in the Israelite army had dared to face including the king and his older, more physically impressive brothers. I'm thinking this is a show of the "heart" that God had already seen and annointed king when in 1 Samuel 17: 45 David greets Goliath by saying, "you come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied..." Lili and I play this game where I pretend that my shadow is eating hers up because it is so much bigger than hers that when I stand in her path my shadow consumes hers, and I think of this when I consider what it might have been like for this young boy to approach the huge, giant of a man in the valley between the two camps, of course, I don't know whether the sun was shining that day, but if it were, I am quite confident that Goliath's shadow similarly consumed David's shadow, and even though he approached without a shred of armor and only a sling accompanied by a few stones as protection David was confident not in himself but in God's power and faithfulness to the point of proclaiming "....All these gathered here will know that it is not by sword or spear that the Lord saves; for the battle is the Lord's and he will give all of you (the Philistine army) into our hands." after saying this David didn't stand reluctantly quaking waiting to be smashed instead he ran at Goliath with confidence. This moves me especially in light of the verse from 2 Chronicles and the revelation in 1 Samuel that God chose David based on the condition of his heart, my guess is it was "fully committed" being that God took this boy considered to be the runt of his litter and strengthened him to the point of being victorious over a giant that grown-men who were trained for battle feared! The verse from 2 Chronicles in conjunction with this story also teaches me that God is still searching the earth for hearts that are fully-committed to him to bring down giants in current and future spiritual battles for his people. If God calls you to such a task, be confident as David was because God still has the back of those who are fully-committed to him!:)

Two other details from this familiar children's Bible story stood out to me fresh and new as I listened to it being taught to the 3rd-5th graders this past Sunday. First, David refused to wear the armor that Saul offered him before he went into battle...this led my mind to consider all the armor we wear each day in an attempt to protect ourselves on an emotional level as we face the world...leave it behind today because you don't need it if you're heart is fully-committed to God because he's got you covered! Secondly, even David in all his faith didn't know to what awesome and abundant extent God was going to provide for and protect him, I mean, the lad gathered up 5, smooth stones when he only needed 1 with God's backing to take down the giant! God's abundance is overlooked in so many ways, for instance, each of you have probably never stopped to thank God for giving you two hands, legs, arms, etc...along with tons of unused, back-up brain cells when you really could accomplish nearly all you need to accomplish with much less. Daily, I am reminded of how abundantly God blesses us when I face the day successfully with little more than half of the physical tools and abilities with which God originally gave me, and I am appalled that it never occurred to me before that all that I am missing now was a gift of abundance over and above what I truly needed to live happily and heathily in this world, so I wonder for what else I am failing to thank my generous creator, but, now, I thank him daily that he provides so abundantly that I can get by with so much less than that which I came prepared, and I know that just like David only needed one of the many stones he gathered to take down the giant that I will continue to experience victory with God's support with only one properly functioning side of my body/brain! Like David, I want to face down the giants in my life whether they are so big they swallow my shadow or not, confidently saying, "I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty,(here I papaphrase) and I'm going to beat your patoot because this battle already belongs to the Lord!" Join me as you fight your daily battles in fully-committed confidence:)

Major application points....honestly examine your heart...Are you fully committed to God? If not, what does that mean in light of these Biblical truths? If so, how does knowing God has your back change your approach to your daily battles? If not, why not...what's holding you back from total committment to God?

Healed!?

2010-03-17T20:12:00.000-07:00

My Lili near to broke my heart on the drive home tonight when she said dejectedly," Its taking a long time for maw-muh's arm to heal," and almost as if it were the harmony to her melody these words whispered through my mind completing her thought, "and I prayed so hard and so much asking Jesus to heal it!" My heart broke at her unspoken disappointment, and I assured her as best I could in that moment that mommy trusted Jesus to answer her prayers in whatever way he saw fit whether it be total physical healing, or simply this plenty miraculous heart-healing he has already accomplished in my life:) I need to tell my girl that Abraham never saw God's promises realized in his physical life as I may never see the use of my stroke-affected arm in this life, but that wasn't because God didn't keep his promises to Abraham, I mean, generations and generations later, we can look at the Biblical texts and see how they are realized in our own lives and see that every promise God made he kept, and just as Abraham witnessed the fulfillment of God's promises on the other side of heaven so I might have to wait anxiously to see the answering of my sweet child's prayers when I meet Jesus face-to-face. In fact, I've already been promised a new body that can run and skip and flail about enthusiastically as I once did, and after Abraham's example, I will wait faithfully knowing that my God is able and trusyworthy, for that day if that is how God writes my story! I mean, really, how could I ask for more than what he's already done for me, so I'm a little gimpy these days. I love him so much and am so greatful for who he is to me that he can take it all if that's what it takes for him to accomplish his will in my life! What I need you to know is that devotion you hear in my words stems from his awesomeness...His awesomeness inspires that level of devotion when realized in even a fragment of its totallity! I write these blogs so that you might recognize this awesomeness on a personal level in your own life because peeps it isn't just for me. The God that Rocks my world wants to rock yours too;) Pray with me that Lili will recognize the healing of my heart as just as relevant, useful, and valuable as the further healing of my body!

FINISH STRONG!

2010-03-15T13:41:00.000-07:00

While at Chick-Fil-A today Lili and I met three little boys named Jeremiah, Benjamin, and Solomon. The last whose name reminded me of some scripture God called to my attention last week during some of my study and prayer time. I was just thumbing through the Old Testament reading over some scriptures I had highlighted in the past when I noticed a startling difference between two seperate verses describing different phases of King Solomon's walk with God, and I became very disturbed, almost haunted by what the verses communicated. Let's look first at 1 Kings 7:41-43 As for the foreigner who does not belong to your people Israel but has come to a distant land because of your name-for men will hear of your great name and your mighty hand and your outstretched arm-when he comes and prays toward this temple, then hear from heaven, your dwelling place, and do whatever the foreigner asks of you, so that all the people's of the earth may know your name and fear you, as do your own people Israel and may know that this house I have built bears your name. In these words of Solomon's I hear a heart for lost people and a whole-hearted dedication to the God of Israel for whom he had erected an ornate temple in obedience to the detailed specifications laid out in earlier chapters of 1 kings which he had received. His obedience as obedience always does speaks of a deep faith born most likely of his father, David's example, but later in Solomon's life we , sadly, see a completely different portrait of the same man. 1 Kings 11 1-3 &6, 11 King Solomon, however, loved many foreign women...They were from nations about which the Lord had told the Israelites,"You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods. Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them in love....and his wives led him astray....So Solomon did evil in the eyes of the Lord. he did not follow the Lord completely......So the Lord said to Solomon,"Since this is your attitude and you have not kept my covenant and my decrees, which I commanded you, I will most certainly tear the kingdom away from you and give it to your subordinates. Whew, I almost feel sorry for him, I mean, he started out so strong in his faith, but because he refused to completely submit to the Lord, he lost his blessing:( It seems the Lord doesn't give a holy crap how grand Solomon's early gesture of faith was. He was only concerned with the current attitude of Solomon's heart, and once again, no matter how much we hate it, the attitude God desires from our hearts is total and complete submission...partial doesn't cut it! He wants us to obey even when its scary or uncomfortable and definitely when we don't want to because obedience in such areas communicates something even greater than submission...love and trust, so personally, what this spoke to me was, Cori, don't rest your faith and your relationship with God on past faithfulness, but rather be TOTALLY faithful with what God has given you NOW! My temple experience with God otherwise known as my grand gesture of faith was when I quit my job givong up its financial security to pursue whatever God called me to which happpened to be writing a book that shared my spiritual testimony up to that point. I have to admit that after having my book published and settling into life serving in the church youth ministry I got comfortable with the idea that I HAD BEEN FAITHFUL, but these scriptures clearly tell us that God isn't concerned with what I WAS...He wants faithfulness in the HERE AND NOW, and who says we can only build one temple in our lifetime? Through this blog, I hope to be establishing the foundations for the second structure in my life that bears Jesus' name! Now, I'm by no means, intending to communicate that for a gesture to be grand it must seem big to anyone outside the intimate circle that is you and God. You and God know what is grand in terms of your life experiences and talents. It may simply be making amends with a long time grudge or submitting to his will in an area of your life in which you have obstinately insisted on your way to your own detriment for years, or it may be submitting to his call to serve him in spite of your insecurities that have encouraged you to resist him in the past. Basically, what he is saying to us through this scripture is FINISH STRONG! Don't, like Solomon, start out your relationship with him all ablaze with fire and passion using your life to build grand structures that attract others to God by bearing his name only to die out to barely an ember of partial committment in the later days of your walk because no matter how grand your early gestures of love and committment may have been only the attitude of your heart in the here and now ensure God's blessing on your life. No matter what you've done in the past, if you refuse to submit in the present, don't be surprised if one day God justly tears the kingdom away from you. This brings to mind,Phillipians 3:12 Not that I have attained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. I love this verse because it speaks of the effort necessary to grow and maintain a relationship with God through Jesus Christ. Not to say that its something we can do that saves us because scripture is very clear that it is only by the grace of God that we are saved, but I do believe scripture clearly communicates a measure of active involvement and willful action is needed on our part to mature beyond infancy as children of God, and if a child is not properly nourished, we know he/she becomes weak to the point of death, so how can this not apply to our souls if we knowingly cut ourselves off from our source of spiritual nourishment by disobedience and half-hearted committment. Listen, once again, to Paul in Acts 20:24 However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me-the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace. Let's make this same committment with Paul to FINISH STRONG accomplishing that or those tasks for which God created us and called us to himself. Solomon got lazy resting on his past faithfulness and failed to remain faithful to the end of the race. He didn't continue to press on in service and committment to the Lord and his lacksidasical, half-hearted attitude left him vulnerable to temptation, and he fell away from God after a strong start....don't let your story mirror his!

Where's My Fruit Salad!?

2010-03-09T14:13:00.000-08:00

Now, this isn't the fruit salad sung about by the famous chidren's group The Wiggles in their catchy tune, Yummy, Yummy. The fruit salad they make has nothing on the fruit salad spoken of in Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. This is the fruit or product that is supposed to be present in the life of any and every individual who truely lives a life submitted to God as fully committed follower of Christ Jesus and his teachings. I can remember a time in my walk with Christ when this scripture puzzled me because I had been baptized, but I knew that in truth I was not producing these fruits that were supposed to be evidences of the Spirit of God at work in my life. In contrast, now, I overflow with what I consider a very yummy, yummy fruit salad in reference to the scripture in Psalm 34:8 that encourages us to Taste and see that the Lord is good. This concept that life in conjunction with God is irresistably scrumptious is repeated in 1 Peter 2:2-3 Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good. So, the question that needs answering is what's changed in my life from then to now? The solution to this puzzle is hidden in plain sight in the stories of Samson in Judges and Saul in 1 Samuel of the Old Testament. Check out Judges 14:6 The Spirit of the Lord was upon him in power, so that he tore the lion apart with his bare hands as he might have torn a young goat(or in terms to which I can relate a wet piece of paper). Compare the strength displayed in Samson when he was fully submitted and obedient to God to later in his life when he had allowed himself to become distracted to the point of disobedience Judges 16:20 Then she called,"Samson,the Philestines are upon you!" He awoke from his sleep and thought, "I'll go out as before and shake myself free." But he did not know that the Lord had left him. Do you see how Samson's life bore the products of a relationship with God (in his case, physical strength) as long as he was fully-committed to obedience, but when he allowed an area of his life (His physical attraction to a pagan woman.) to fall out of submission to God's will, his life became barren, producing no fruit. One can see a very similar example recorded from the life of Saul in chapter 13 0f Judges. God appoints Saul as king over Israel expressing his pleasure with Saul by blessing his life until Saul chooses the path of partial-obedience, which we find to be disobedience in God's eyes when in verse 14 Samuel reveals a different kind of fruit, the fruit of disobedience, which happens to be the removal of said blessing" But now your kingdom will not endure; the Lord has sought out a man after his own heart and appointed him leader of his people, because you have not kept the Lord's command." Just in case it isn't as clear as I think it is, I'll clarify that the difference in my life now from when I wasn't experiencing the fullness of my relationship with God is what I discovered after close and honest reflection of my life. Areas existed in my life, in the past, in which I was not fully-obedient/submitted to God's will for me. It took months of prayer and digging into God's word to discover the hidden committment issues to which I ignorantly clung that robbed me of the pleasure of enjoying the delectable fruit salad with which God desired to nourish me. Upon discovering these areas and realizing how they were limiting my ability to experience all the beauties of knowing Christ, with God's guidance and assistance I died to myself, once again (and have had to do daily since), and submitted to God's plan and desires trusting fully that his power, provision, and wisdom were all I needed in life, and talk about abubdant fruit. I've near to drowned in the stuff ever since, so if after some honest introspection you identify a fruit shortage in your life akin to spiritual scurvy, I challenge you to investigate and discover what areas of your life you still foolishly cling to not believing God is strong enough or wise enough to safely guide you, and pry your fingers loose of those areas with the help of a friend or family member if necessary, and drop it at God's feet. I promise it will be terrifying at first because you have been hanging on under the dillusion that doing things your way is the only safe way, but I guarentee you that if it makes you feel vulnerable, you are on the right path. The one that leads to abundant fruit salad, yummy, yummy:) If you want more details about the specific areas I needed to submit to God in full-obedience before getting a taste of God's fruit in my own life, check out my book, This Is My Story...Its all in there in more detail than I care to write here! If as you read this, you think," that's not me," at least take time to inventory your fruit because a shortage is a guarentee that you're holding something back, and there is more abundant life waiting to be had by you, so please, partake in the fruit feast God has prepared for you! Don't deny yourself the mouth-watering delacacies of peace, joy, and love!

1-2--3 Victory!

2010-02-27T20:01:00.000-08:00

My last post centered around the fact I had recently dropped my Zoloft in favor of eliminating a potential flaw in my witness for Christ, but turns out, I'm NUTS without my daily 100mg, so much to my husband and Lili's relief I am once again properly medicated! I have to qualify that I was not sad or depressed and my joy was in no way compromised off my anti-depressant, although, I was crying tears of nearly every emotion one can list while giggling uncontrolably, so I am quite pleased to be experiencing the normalizing effect of my nightly tablet these days! No joke, last Sunday the sermon brought home God's faithfulness to me as if I were living it in that moment, and my joy was so pure and complete that, as they say, "my cup runneth over" along with my eyes and nose to the extent that I am quite confident that the woman behind me who offered to pray for me along with my husband must have been convinced that I was being convicted of some terrible secret sin which amused me and brought on rolls of loud sob-like guffaws of laughter,mind you, all right in the middle of church service. It wasn't long after this event that I decided to go back on my meds as soon as possible! I was hoping to share the video of that sermon along with this blog post but was unable to figure out how to, so if you would like to view it, go to crossroadschristian.com where it can be viewed under Chapter 7 of THE STORY sermon series.
Since I cannot share the video as I had hoped, I will instead share the excerpts that touched my heart along with a few tidbits that impressed me as I wrote, prepared and taught the accompanying upper elementary lesson covering the same content. Our minister drew three aspects of divine warfare that can still be effectively utilized in our lives today as we face spiritual battles of all kinds from the story of the Israelites entering the promised land (1) being a people (or a person) of the word, (2) being a people(or a person) of prayer, and (3) being a people (or a person) who identifies with God formerly through circumcision but currently through baptism. Why did this move me so? Well, because my life is a testament to the absolute truth held in these bits of wisdom from the Bible, and that just spoke to my heart of God's complete and total awesomeness! I've spent the greater part of my adult life clearly identified with God through Jesus Christ in baptism and deeply entrenched in the word allowing God to go before me in my life decisions through prayer just as the Israelites carried the Ark of the Covenant before their procession, and being the same today as he was then, never-changing, my God, the God of the Isaaelites, the one true God has led me into victory despite what should have been defeating odds just like he did for the Israelites. Since I'm on my Zoloft tonight, I can write this tear-free although my heart still swells with overwhelming love for my God and King! What I want you to know from the top of your head to the tip of your big toe is that God SO wants to lead you in victory also! I'm nothing special nor have I been good enough to deserve it or anything else (neither were the Israelites)....God just loves us and wants to do this for us if we'll allow him to, so if you are feeling defeated in life, claim victory through Jesus with the three aspects of divine warfare I mentioned earlier:) One other tidbit that impacted me from this story was a detail that was emphasized in the upper elementary large group lessom for which I can take no credit. Evidentally, the Israelites had to cross a river to enter Canaan, and once afain God parted the waters for them to walk across on dry land. I guess the Israelites gathered stones from the dry river bed before the water returned to its place and made a monument of remembrance with them....I have such a monument on the bathroom counter between the two sinks sit a faith plaque my family physician gave me along with a few Willow tree angel figurines each with a special meaning, and a clinging cross all which were given to me when God was helping me cross safely through a rough patch in my life on the road to victory. Eaxh item is a stone I gathered and now display to remind me each day of how I have arrived on the opposite side of that tradgedy victorious....I share this because I believe remembrance is key to growth iin our relationship with God. I fear that if we fail to actively remember that instead of moving forward, we will slip back.

Love Happens!

2010-02-20T20:41:00.000-08:00

This may take awhile to piece together, and at this moment, I am not confident I can express all that is transpiring in my mind and soul as clearly as I hope...so clearly that you can experience it as well, but I now begin my feeble effort, so let's just say that if you are able to understand what I am writing God has intervined on my behalf and yours as well;)
Let's begin with the movie I just viewed as I soaked my aching back in the warm waters of our whirl pool, LOVE HAPPENS, a new release starring Jennifer Aniston and some guy I didn't recognize....a tear-jerker/romance featuring no sex, nudity, or inuendo to my pleasant surprise, although it did sport some unfortunate language on occassion, but enough with the movie review. The premise was this man had experienced a great tradgedy, losing his wife in a car accident, and being a psychologist had made a career out of helping others face similar tradgedies by authoring a book detailing how he had moved on to experience a full life in spite of loss and speaking at related conferences all while harboring the secret that he had never truely dealt with his own loss. As the plot unfolds, Burke Ryan, Phd. meets Eloise the florist who in time discovers his secret hypocrasy and helps him finally accomplish what he had never been able to do on his own...find peace in tradgedy and live as if he'd gained rather than lost in life. I'm sharing this with you not because I found it to be exceptional entertainment or expressing a valuable lesson, in fact, being an individual who has encountered a few lemons in life, although not the same ones focused on by the movie, I found it rather misleading and was disturbed that an individual who had not yet been able to come to terms with the events of life might after seeing the film attempt to manufacture the false sense of well-being that the movie sells. All of this impacted me because I have lost in many ways and believing with my whole heart that I have only gained, I set out each day hoping to have the opportunity to share the joy and peace I have been blessed to experience even in tragedy with others who are suffering or who have suffered. In effect, I related on a certain level with, Mr.Burke Ryan, Phd., not only as a fellow sufferer but as an author and hopeful speaker. Even to the point that recently, in an attempt to avoid the perception of hypocracy in my own story, I chose to wean off the anti-depressant Zoloft that I had been placed on immediately following my stroke being that many timr the brain-damage caused by stroke impairs the part of the brain that manages moods and such things. I want to be clear that I am not expressing an anti-medication view-point because as a special educator, I have witnessed many individuals achieve successes that might otherwise have been unrealized with the support of medication, but I did want to avoid providing any nay-sayer who heard my story the opportunity of proclaiming that the joy and peace I live as a disabled stroke survivor might have a source other than the love of Jesus Christ because I know deep in my heart that it springs from nothing other than the relationship I enjoy with my creator through the love, grace, and forgiveness of Jesus. Personally, I needed to prove that I didn't need Zoloft to maintain my joy because Jesus has me covered, and I needed to ensure that my witness did not in any manner become tainted, so that no one missed out on the awesome treasure I have to share with anyone who is interested in life-changing treasures:) Alright, those are the levels on which I related to the plot, but now, moving on to the misleading message that I feel the film projected. Mr. Burke's's main speaking point was the old saying, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, which communicates that finding sweetness in the sour moments of life is something we as individuals can accomplish on our own, but as I mentioned, even this secular film was able to identify the farce in this statement by emphasizing Mr. Burke's inability to manufacture sweetness in his own sitution, but what I did find to be on point was that love is what finally did enable Ryan Burke, Phd. to overcome the tragic events in his life. Although the healing love I know and hope for you to know, as well, does not manifest as a quirky and attractive florist, but rather as a poor, Jewish carpenter whose love runs so deep for each of us that he chose to pay the punishment for our individual wrong acts in hopes that we would accept his gift and choose to be his friend and follower for life.
WOW! I hope you hear this with your heart and soul coming from a woman who can inventory the tangible losses she has experienced that I truely have only gained through all the tragedy in my life. Unlike what Ryan Burke was offering his audiences, what I am hoping to pass on to you is REAL and EFFECTIVE! Although I am totally human and imperfect and close inspection of my life would undoubtedly reveal that as a fact. I guarentee that the joy, peace, and contentment I experience in this life are hypocracy-free, and the greatest thing is that its available to you, too!

A Tribute To Grandma Lee

2010-02-11T03:17:00.000-08:00

If your world seems just a bit dimmer, it may be because the sweet, innocent flame of my Grandmother's life has been fading this week after burning vibrantly on this earth for 93 years...during which she lost her mother at the age of 3 and due to the fact she had numerous siblings and her father, Jasper, felt he didn't have the skills or resources to raise her alone, she was given to friends of the family to raise as their own. Aunt Bessie and Uncle Jack brought Mary Louise Hotz up in the small river town of Shoals, IN. They ran a boarding house out of their home from which many of the pleasant childhood memories Grandma Lee would often share came. The love of her life Harry Lee grew up down the street, and although I am not aware of how they became acquainted, I do know that out of their marriage came the most spectacular mother, Nancy Pannell, with whom God ever could have blessed me along with another daughter, Carolyn Parker. Honestly, the breif sketch I have of Grandma's life before she knew me is a little like a fairy tale in my imagination probably because she lived her life with such gentleness, grace and beauty that I always viewed her as if she were royalty! I know that she waited longer than I did even in these modern times to marry and have children, and being the modern, trend-setter that she was braved the world of men to attain her driver's liscense while she worked in factories as my Grandfather served our country in the Navy. As I lace together the stories she told with the fantasy-like ribbon that is my view of my Grandma Lee, I realize that another reason I might have such an unearthly perspective of her life is that I never heard her complain or express a negative thought about any person or event as she shared these little snapshots of who she was before I knew life. Being that my Grandparents escaped the perils of Pearl Harbor due to a medical discharge, they headed back to Shoals to start and raise their family in a circle of friends from church, where my Grandma played piano and organ for years while faithfully worshipping even in turmoil, and various community clubs while partnering to run a flooring business that served all over Indiana until my Grandfather's health failed due to a series of heart related illnesses culminating when I was 10-months-old in death. Grandma Lee never remarried but remained beautiful, independent, and vibrant for the next 30 years of my life wooing me into the adoration of a grandchild with her complete sweetness that always manifested itself with a smile on her face and a gentle touch from her soft, warm hand preceding a seemingly endless conversation that left you feeling as if you had entered another more innocent much more wonderful time when life moved at a much gentler clip and ladies where actually ladies by definition as they paraded through life with their hair all in perfect place and their modest clothing crisp and tidy with only a light kiss of make-up highlighting already perfect skin that belied any age at all as they charmed the world around them with kindness and generosity that in unknown in today's world. I adore my Grandma Lee, and she is so worthy of every bit of my adoration because I know that more of my impression of her is reality than one would believe possible! Although she never went on about Jesus in the noisy, potentially annoying way I do, I know from her legacy (the one that lives on in me) that this woman will soon be in the company of my Savior, and I will be pleased to meet her there as a fellow daughter of the KING when God sees fit to call me home! Thank you Grandma for everything that you have always been to me, and for everything your memory will continue to be to me and the generations after me! your memory will continue to bless us forever:)

I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice, and I am persuaded now lives in you also. 2 Timothy 1:5

Tie a String on Your Finger!

2010-02-07T21:22:00.000-08:00

This past week I've struggled spiritually. I really can't put my finger on a particular struggle, but I was panicing because I put myself out here as an example for Christ, and I was terrified that if I didn't get it together I would become more of a stumbling block than an inspiration:( Thankfully, as I was contemplating the battle that was raging in my soul on Saturday before we headed to church, I was reminded of another such battle in the ongoing war for my soul that is detailed in my book This Is My Story. The remembrance brought me into God's presence instantaneously reminding me also of how essential remembering is to progressing in one's walk with Christ! All through the Old Testament God admonishes the Israelites to remember or more commonly worded do not forget - Deuteronomy 5:15 Remember that you were slaves in Egypt and that the Lord your God brought you out of there with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm, and 1 Chronicles 16:12 Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always. Remember the wonders he has done, his miracles, and the judgements he pronounced, O descendants of Israel his servant, O sons of Jacob, his chosen ones. Also, Deuteronomy 6:12 then when you eat and our satisfied, be careful that you do not forget the Lord, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. I often wondered as a child after hearing the stories from the Old Testament how it was possible for the Israelites to get so off track in their walk with God so quickly after witnessing first-hand his awesome power when he freed them from Egypt with his wisdom and the plagues and the parting of the Red Sea, I mean, how, after walking through a canyon with walls of water that you saw form before your very eyes at God's direction, does one end up worshipping a golden statue of a calf instead of the one who had performed those great acts in your life? Quite simply, the answer is by failing to remember, but still, when one experiences something that awesome, how is it possible to forget it? I'll tell you what, it doesn't make sence to me, but I know its possible because God recorded this historical incident as a warning to us that its possible to get distracted and forget what we know without a doubt , so I choose to religiously adhere to this same warning also found in Deuteronomy 4:9 Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. I take this admonition so seriously in my own life that when I thought I might die during open-heart surgery I recorded a detailed account of all the ways in which God had worked in my life for my daughter Lili so that in my possible absence she might still know and love the awesome God that her mother encountered so personally in life. I believe this might be where we fall short as parents and Christians in today's society. We fail to relate to one another and the next generation the awesome ways God has worked in our lives. There are proofs of God's existence and the reality of a close personal relationship with him through Jesus Christ all around us, but we produce offspring who fail to realize this because we never point it out to them in our personal experience:) I'll tell you what, my Lili and any other child I encounter in this life is going to know about the great and awesome ways God has freed me from slavery and led me safely through trial after trial in this life with a fully satisfied and joyful soul because that is the inheritance I want to pass on to them, and I believe because God's word says its true that remembering is vital to maintaining a healthy and vibrant relationship with God, so I commit to providing anyone and everyone with something real, current, and relevant to remember...that's what I'm attempting to do with this blog...give you something to remember just in case you don't yet have Red Sea moments to recall from your own story of deliverance...you are most welcome to borrow mine until you do, and just so you know, if you don't already have a story of deliverance of your own, God is ready and willing pen in hand to write it...just start walking with him through Jesus Christ, and you will be well on your way to recognizing God's deliverance and prescence in your own life!

Follow the Arrows

2010-02-07T17:19:00.000-08:00

I haven't been doing a good job keeping up with the reading of THE STORY or following along with the corresponding Biblical text in the manner I intended, but I have been forced to keep up with the story line as I remain faithful in keeping my commitment to write lessons for the upper elementary youth at church, and I am intoxicated with love for my heavenly father as I have rediscovered his deep desire to be in a relationship with us as he begins to actively work out his plan of redemption through the Israelites! I am repeatedly amazed by his great skill as an author, teacher, and parent as I witness the beautiful manner in which he foreshadows his entire plan to restore his relationship with his fallen creation(you and I)! As I wrote for Sontown I failed, I fear, to precisely capture and relate my amazement and adoration for my creator, so I hope I don't fail here as well because I want you to be able to share in my experience at his feet...here we go, let's start with 2 Peter 2:9-10 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. Once you were not a people but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy. Originally, God set Israel apart as his chosen people, and in giving this young nation the 10 commandments, he hoped to make them identifiable to the rest of the world as his people resulting in their becoming a directional arrow pointing directly to him for any individual who has lost their way on the journey we call life. This intent behind the "rules" that so many despise and reject as old-fasioned rhetoric was to lovingly bring us home from our lost and wondering state separated from our Creator. So, that brings us to the question of what role we play in this scenario: (1) the flashing neon arrow pointing to God - or- (2) the lost wonderer questioning the origin of the strange yet attractive light radiating from your friend, co-worker, neighbor, the author of this blog (I hope), or the gentle stranger who helped you in your time of need? Let's question deeper...Alright ones asks yourselves," Does my life readily point the way to God so that those I encounter in life are unmistakingly directed to him?" and "If I can't honestly answer with a resounding, 'YES,' what is dimming the light of my arrow?" Okay, twos, its your turn...Why do you continue to put off seeking out the source of that strange yet appealing light you have noticed in one of the aforementioned individuals or someone else I have failed to mention? I mean, you're a go-getter aren't you, so go get it!:) Don't be reluctant to pursue your interest because the attraction you're experiencing is the call of your creator back home into a relationship with him exactly where you were created to be! Doesn't that sound wonderful! It most assuredly is! Feel loved because God has designed the entire universe just to attract you back to him:) I write these things for you to read simply because I want you to experience the peace, joy, fulfillment/contentment I get to experience daily as I live life in relationship with God. As I said, my membership in his family through Jesus Christ is not mine exclusively, but something he wants for you as well, so I share these things in hopes that you, too, will recognize the beauty and perfection of God's love for you and enter into the light of his presence through Jesus Christ:)

Back Flips

2010-02-02T06:10:00.000-08:00

I have come into contact with a wonderful illustration of the type of faith God requires from us. Its much more than believing that God exists James 2:19 You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that-and shudder. Beyond believing in God's existence, he wants us to believe in what he says-to take him at his word. In other words, when he says something, we need to view it as the undisputable truth. That is beliving and faith at its fullest! My daughter Lili is how I came by the illustration of faith I mentioned earlier. Imagine that, a child displaying faith that exemplifies God-honoring faith! Mark 10:19"Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." So, let me tell you how a little child receives God's word....my daughter, as I previously mentioned learned a new Bible verse in preschool church Phillipians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength, and she believes these words from the Bible so much that she thinks her disabled mother or anyone else including you, I am sure, can do a backflip through Christ who gives us strength. Its sweet and silly, but it makes me think, "Does my faith measure up?" Because I can guarantee you I haven't yet nor do I plan to ever attempt that backflip that she believes with her whole heart that I can do. In fact, recently, I have been fearful of what I may be getting myself into as I pursue to fill a speaking schedule. "Am I up to what all it will entail?" "Do I really have anything to say that could impact a person for Christ?" my mind questions as I pass out business cards advertising this blog and providing contact info to book speaking engagements. Jesus looks at me with disappointment I fear when he hears these thoughts bouncing around in my skull, and responds to me much like he did to his disciples in Mark 4:40 "Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?" When Jesus said this he had just calmed a terrible storm that the disciples had feared would take their lives, and they still cowered in fear. I think Jesus wondered, didn't you just witness the great display of my power? Why are you still afraid instead of trusting that I am in control and can deal with any thing that comes your way as long as you're with me. Of course, maybe they were afraid of him because of the power they had witnessed from his hand, but I have a feeling Jesus is beyond misunderstanding body language and behavioral cues! Now, I wonder right along with Jesus at the fear I am experiencing as I face a few potential audiences after witnessing him calming the most recent storm in my life! Do I really believe deep in my heart just as Lili does that I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength be it a back flip or a speaking engagement? I do! Amazing how recognizing he is at my side dispels all fear! Are you fearful today? Ask Jesus to be your wing-man, and you can do all things through him who gives you strength!...even a back flip;) You may say, "I've never witnessed any display of God's power, and I respond, " read back through my blog posts to witness second hand what he's done in my life, or take in the story of the Exodus of the Israelites in the Old Testament, or consider Jesus' resurrection after he was crucified on the cross because these events display the power that is at work in the lives of those who have Jesus at their side!" Just so you know, there is no need to worry that I will be attempting any back flips today; however, I may fearlessly pass out a few business cards and contemplate what the future may hold;)

Carry that Cross!

2010-01-29T08:15:00.000-08:00

...pick up your cross and follow me. These are a few of Jesus' words from somewhere in the Bible that I cannot share with you at this time because I have only a ridiculously small amount of scripture actually memerized, and I'm in a hotel on a business trip with my husband and didn't pack my Bible, but these words came into focus for me last weekend during my churches' worship service. A member of the congregation was singing a special song that reflected on this verse, and of course, I do not know the name of the song or the exact lyrics, but I know the gist of the lyrics that brought clarity to the concept of the cross in the verse I mentioned because that was always the part of this verse that I never quite understood. What was my cross, and how was I supposed to pick it up and carry it if I didn't know what it was? Well, back to the lyrics,"...I didn't know the hill was this steep, or that the cross was this heavy..." Something about those lyrics, and I can't tell you what, expressed to me that the cross we are to pick up and carry is whatever it takes in the course of our lives to glorify Jesus and help others know him as the awesome Savior and God that he is! My cross recently has been bearing up under the physical and emotional hardship of medical issues and resulting disabilities with a smile on my face that radiates from the joy and hope of Jesus in my heart. Quite honestly, its not something I've done, it is something he's done through me! I can't really explain all the way how I really haven't been an active participant in creating or maintaining this, honest to goodness, well of joy and hope that resides within me, and I can tell you that I would carry this cross over a millon times and as long as Jesus needs me to just to experience this and have him by my side! Yes, the hill is steep, and as I was growing up in the church hearing this verse over and over, I had no idea how steep the hill or how heavy the cross, but I can tell you that daily as I carry my cross for Jesus the last thing on my mind is its weight or the grade of the hill. I am just basking in the presence of my Savior as he assists me in bearing the load! You know, my mind goes to the retelling of Jesus' experience at the cross...He was bearing the weight all alone when someone from the crowd was drafted to assist our staggering Savior. This foreshadowing is beautiful to me for two reasons. First, because the idea of having assistance in bearing the load of the cross is born (Jesus is the one who comes readily to our aid.), and secondly, just like a common man was pulled from the crowd to help Jesus accomplish his purpose, God is still pulling common men and women from the crowd like me to help Jesus accomplish his purpose! Oh, how I wish I had my Bible to find the references that are popping into my head as I type...I just located the Gideon Bible in the room, so hopefully, it will be of assistance! Anyway, my challenge for you is to identify what your cross is and to hoist it onto your shoulders for the glory of God knowing Jesus is coming along right beside you to help shoulder the load! For me, the simple knowledge that my suffering has a purpose makes it totally bearable, so I hope the thought that whatever you are experiencing in your life could just be God drafting you to help carry on the purpose of Jesus' cross, bringing lost souls back into a relationship with God through Christ, strengthens your ability to endure under whatever suffering you are currently experiencing! Tonight as my arm aches endlessly from the spasticity there, I thank God for honoring me with the task of bearing this cross, so that one of you might come to know him more! God created you and loves you, and will do whatever it takes to get into a close, personal relationship with you including putting me in a position to witness effectively to you, and I want you to know I am a willing participant in his plan to reclaim you for himself because, as I said, I know he loves you and values you, and therefore loving him, I love you and value you. I know you are worth whatever it takes to show you that a life lived in relationship with God through Jesus is the only life you deserve! Its the life you were created to live, so start living it now:) I'll post the related scriptures when I get home.

Paid In Full

2010-01-26T20:47:00.000-08:00

Last week there was a message going around on Facebook that encouraged its recipients tally a fine by adding up monetary values assigned to vatious indecent/dangerous/illegal behaviors and afterward, post the total "fine" as their status. Upon receipt of the message, I was curious, so I followed the instructions and posted my fine minus $.10 for peeing in a pool because I thought the value would be too easy to identify, and, at the time, I really didn't want to divulge such a yucky incident, but, now, I have. Later, while I was reading comments that had been made on such status posts, I realized that there was almost a congratulatory nature present in most of the responses, and I was immediately ashamed to have participated in the game because, although I desire to be forthcoming about the person that I am, neither am I proud of the wrong choices I have made in the past, and it shames me to think that I may have made it appear as if I were flaunting my sinfulness as if I were proud of it! Then, as I contemplated how I might have damaged my witness for Christ by playing this game that seemed to me now to mock God and the behavioral boundaries he has set forth to protect us, the word fine struck me in a whole new way. The Bible teaches us that we all owe a fine for our sin...The wages of sin is death Romans 6:23 and for ALL have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God Romans 3:23! The great news for all us sinners is the aforementioned fine has been paid in full by Jesus Christ! Surely he took our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him, and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities;the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed. Isaiah 53:4-5. He himself bore our sins in his body on that tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness. 1 Peter 2:24 This last verse really brings it home for me!...the words in his body really speak to my heart to what extent my Savior paid my fine. He carried my sins of pridefulness, lust, impatience, greed, dishonesty, unfaithfulness and selfishness in his body. I mean, the specific sins I, Cori Lukomski, have committed in my 30 years of life were carried by Jesus to the cross in his body in order to pay the fine that I owed, and that's why I love him because really knowing me and my sins so personally that he internalized them, he still paid the brutal and deadly fine in my place, and not just my place and my sins, yours, too, so in the last several sentences when i've referred to myself, replace it with yourself and try to wrap your mind around the awesomeness of what Jesus has done for you. Oh.before I wrap this up, I want you to come with me to the scene of the cross for just a moment. Matthew 27:46 About the ninth hour he cried out in a loud voice, "Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?-which means My God, My God, Why have you forsaken me?" For me, this verse carries the weight of what Jesus did for me on that cross! Because my sin and yours dirtied his purity in that moment, God had to turn away from him, and Jesus cries out in anguish as he experiences the separation from God that I will never have to face because he did it for me and you! What you've got to know is that for some of us it is like the cell phone rebate offer that sits on my kitchen table unrealized. Somewhere out there $100.00 waits for me to fill out the form and mail it in with my receipt to claim it. Jesus's forgiveness or his payment for your fine is like that, its paid in full, but each person has to claim it personally to receive its benefit, so you might ask me why I haven't sent the stuff in to claim that $100...The answer is "I don't really know...probably something like laziness paired with complacency. I keep putting it off thinking, "one day I will," or "maybe tomorrow." So, my question for you is quite similar if you have never claimed the forgiveness that Jesus offers you personally. If your answers are similar to mine as well, realize like I should that there will not always be a "one day" or a "tomorrow," so why not do it today! There are no forms to fill out or receipts to send in...just have a conversation with God letting him know you admit you have sinned and need to receive the forgiveness Jesus offers and want to do so today In doing so, you admit that you believe Jesus is God's son, and that you want to commit to be a follower of Jesus with the rest your life. Following such a decision with baptism by emersion is the way Jesus set forth(Matthew 3:15)
to confess to the world your new alliance with God. As a grand gesture of encouragement for you to take this step and become a Christian if you never have before, I am going to complete my cell phone rebate form and get it ready to mail out tomorrow as soon as I'm done writing this post!

Squeaky Clean

2010-01-20T12:57:00.000-08:00

My mom is one of the best gift givers I know rivalled only by my husband, Tim, and this Christmas she along with my father gave me two coupons that stated she would bring her house cleaner to my home for the day to help me with whatever house-cleaning tasks remain frustrating to the point of neglect, so today I cashed in my first coupon. While I was busying around early this morning attempting to tidy the house before mom arrived with her cleaning lady, Fannie, in tow, it occurred to me how ridiculous it was to clean for the cleaning lady, and that thought reminded me of how before I officially became a Christian, I kept putting it off thinking I had to prepare myself before I asked Jesus into my heart. I would try very hard for a period of time to be what I considered good, and of course, fail, but I had this ridiculous notion that I couldn't invite Jesus in until I got myself all cleaned up in terms of behavior fully realizing that was his job. I can now see how silly that idea was, but at the time, it was very real to me and caused me to put off a very important decision for longer than was necessary because now, I know that just like Fannie thinks nothing of walking into a dirty house and getting down to the business of deep cleaning because that is her job, Jesus knows we are a mess, being that we're human and all, and gladly enters into our lives no matter how messy they are with the intent of accomplishing what we cannot on our own...cleaning things up until we are white as snow. I am very grateful for how sparkly clean my shower doors are at this moment and the crisp, new look of the upolstry on my freshly scrubbed furniture, but I am eternally grateful for the masterful cleaning job that Jesus did in my heart when I invited him to be a part of my life by committing to following his teachings and acknowledging I needed the forgiveness he offered on the cross. If you knew the me that I am without Jesus, you would be thankful too;) The before and after difference in me is much more breathtaking than the gleam of my shower doors, or the fresh scent of cleaner that wafts into ones nose when they walk through the door of my house today. If your life is a mess, I highly recommend asking Jesus to help you tidy tings up because he cleans up a life better than Scrubbing Bubbles cleans a shower or Resolve cleans upolstry!

Scriptures of Note:

Matthew 23:26 First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then, the outside also will be clean.

Psalm 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, oh God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.

1 Peter 2: 24 He himself bore our sins upon that tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

Isaiah 1:18 "Come now, let us reason together, " says the Lord. "Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be white as snow; though they be red as crimson, they shall be like wool.

Bloggle study:1/19/10: Genesis 13-18

2010-01-19T07:19:00.000-08:00

The thing I love the most about the story of Abraham is all the talk of his descendants and the inheritance good old Abe passes down to us through Jesus! My favorite part of this inheritance that I have received through Christ Jesus is in 15:1 Do not be afraid, Abram I am your shield your very great reward., and then in 18:19 it tells us exactly how Abraham passed this inheritance down and how we can continue to hand it down to the generations following us For I have chosen him so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just. I am so glad that Abraham, his descendants leading up to my parents, and my parents were faithful to pass this inheritance of hope, comfort, and safety down to me because knowing that God is my shield having the opportunity to know him through Jesus has been a very great reward indeed! There is nothing greater that I can give to my daughter than the understanding that there is no need to fear in this world because God's got her back and that being in a relationship with him is a reward greater than anything this world can offer! Speaking of relationships, how awesome is the relationship that Abraham enjoys with God? God visits, Abraham sits and talks with him, God welcomes Abraham's questions and patiently entertains Abraham's frustration and resulting suggestions. That is the kind of relationship God created us to have with him. I can feel it when I read the text because my whole being longs for it!

Spiritual Failing #1,000,000,001: Animal Rights Gone Wild

2010-01-18T05:45:00.000-08:00

When my husband and I moved into our new home over a year ago, God introduced me to a few members of his treasured creation with whom I have divergent views on animal care. Unfortunately, when these diverging views came to a head toward the end of last week, I failed to respond in a God honoring manner.( I became angry, and in my anger lost sight of the fact that the object of my scorn was an individual who God deeply loves and treasures. The casualties of my fit are still being tallied, but among them are the two dogs I had come to love as my own through caring the best I could for the needs I noticed had gone unmet. In the midst of the disaster that was last week, I contacted animal control who swiftly confiscated the aforementioned canines wisking them away to what I fear may have ended in their death. My greater fear is that the lives of the pooches were not the only casualty resulting from this fiasco that ended in unkind words and haughty attitudes. A relationship with my neighbor who also happens to be the beautiful and adored creation of the God I love seems to have been sacrificed on the altar of my pride, and in the end the two mangey-muts I was attempting to assist are probably dead, too! Something our minister has said on several ocassions sticks in my mind concerning the manner in which our society values and protects animal life and disregards human life being a travesty, and when he would make these statements of disgust, I would nod my head in agreement and think that I would never be guilty of such a shameful miscalculation of value, but there I was last week guilty of placing my concern for my neighbor's dogs well-being above my concern for maintaining our relationship and upholding my example for Christ. Now, I wonder,"Does she know Jesus? Was I the one meant to introduce them? Is there any way to repair the damage I have done?" In response to that last question, the Holy Spirit reminds me that a dead relationship will be a cake-walk for the God who raised Lazarus and Jesus from the dead.
Amazingly, after the events of the week, the sermon that greeted me Saturday night at church largely had to do with the importance of doing all one can to restore broken relationships starting with prayer and ending with persitance with face-to-face humility sandwiched in between the two, so I've been praying, and today off I trot across the yard, up the stairs to her front door with a humble heart with plans to persist in forgiveness and acceptance until God chooses to ressurrect my relationship with my neighbor. So, pray for me as I try to make amends with my neighbor and join me in committing to view each person with whom I come into contact as abeautiful and valuable creation of God made in his glorious image. Also, let's commit to doing everything we can to live in peace with all those we encounter in this life, and if we have failed to do so in the past, let's pray, have humble heats, and persist in our attempts walk along side of God as he restores what has been lost with the same power that raised Jesus from the dead!

Scriptures of Note:

Ephesians 4:26 In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.

Ephesians 4: 29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that they may benefit those who listen.

Romans 14:19 Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of [dogs] food.

Romans 7:19 For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do-this I keep doing.

Ephesians 1: 18-21 I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints and his incomprehensibly great power for us who believe. The power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead.

More on Obedience:Bloggle Study 1/14/10: Genesis 9-12

2010-01-14T05:53:00.000-08:00

We adopted a 2-month-old puppy, and my schedule has been all out of whack in defference to her needs, so blogging hasn't been on the agenda for nearly a week. Thankfully, Bernadette Minnie Lukomski, who being 14 lbs at 2 months is going to be a monster as an adult, did not wake Lili this morning with her yipping, and I have some much needed time to myself to get into God's word and write! I started where I think I left off with chapters 9 and 10 which I basically skimmed being that they were prmarily geneologies, and as I said before, i recognize that they have significance simply because God included them, but I am not educated as to what it is, so I will not even attempt to go there. In chapter 11 we pick up with the account of the tower of Babel, and I have a note written by my hand in th margin of the page that says this event transpired before the flood. I do not know when or why I wrote that note. I'm sure it is something I heard in a sermon or Bible Study meeting, but I cannot verify its accuracy. Even as I ponder the notes origin, I can begin to see where the people in this story went wrong in verse 4 Then they said, "Come let us build ourselves a city with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves and not be scattered over the face of the whole earth. First, their motivation was selfish, and secondly, it seems to me that their purpose of preventing themselves from being scattered was in direct disobedience to God's wishes expressed earlier in Genesis 1:28 God blessed them and said to them, " be fruitful and increase in number, fill the earthans subdue it. This may be a stretch, but if they were refusing to scatter, how were they going to "fill" the earth? We see in verse 8 what God thought of their disobedience and how far they got on their own. Lili is only three, as I am sure I have mentioned many times, but she is already hiding God's word in her heart. One of the first verses she learned was Phillipians 4:13I can do everything through him who gives me strength. The architects, builders, and supporters of the tower of Babel where attempting to accomplish something great on their own for their own glory and praise without God's blessing, and I hope we can see the cause/effect relationship in their level of success;) We are no different than these people from so long ago seeking to accomplish great things to make a name for ourselves or making decisions on our own in an attempt to control our environment rather than looking into God's word and testing our plans based on his desires for our lives. When we live our lives like this, we can see from this account in Genesis how the story will end....in confusion and a pile of rubble! What I believe this story is trying to tell us today is include God in the plans of our lives....because no matter how thoroughly you plan if you try to do life on your own without tapping into God's strength and wisdom...confusion and rubble will be in your story, too, and wow, speaking of submitting to God's plan Abraham is comong up next in Genesis 12, and this dude just picks up and leaves his homeland and everything he knows at God's command., and there is a huge difference in this stories ending! When we live our lives submitted to God's plan instead of insisting on our own way, blessing beyond comprehension will ensue. Genesis 12:1-4 The Lord had said to Abram, "Leave your country, your people and your father's household and go to the land I will show you. I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse; and all peoples on earth will be blessed through you.So Abram left, as the Lord had told him; and Lot went with him. Abram was 75-years-old when he set out from Haran. I love that Abram was 75 because it goes to show that you are never too old or too anythin else for God to begin a great work in your life! Because, remember, this is all about His strength and glory...nor ours! I, also, find great comfort in the fact that the man God found worthy enough to choose as the beginning ofthe line of Jesus Christ immediately screwed up and forgot everything I have been praising him for because that is just what I would have done! It, once again, gives me hope that God could love and effectively use a screwed up mess like me to accomplish his work on this earth! The first act I am referring to can be found in Genesis 12:10-20Now there was a famine in the land, and Abram went down to Egypt to loive for awhile because the famine was so severe. As he was about to enter Egypt, he said to his wife Sairai, "I know what a beautiful woman you are. When the Egyptians see you, they will say, 'this is his wife' Then they will kill me but will let you live. Say you are my sister, so that I will be treated well for your sake and my life will be spared because of you." When Abram came to Egypt, the Egyptians saw that she was a very beautiful woman. And when Pharoah's officials saw her, they praised her to Pharoah, and she was taken into his palace. He treated Abram well for her sake, and Abram acquired sheep and cattle, male and female donkeys, menservans and maidservants, and camels. But the Lord inflicted serious diseases on Pharoah and his household because of Abram's wife Sarai. So Pharoah summoned Abram "What have you done to me?" he said "Why didn't you tell me she was your wife? Why did you say'She is my sister?,' so that I took her to be my wife?" Now then, here is your wife. Take her and go!" Then Pharoah gave orders about Abram to his men, and they sent him on his way, with his wife and everything he had. Here Abram starts to get worried about his well-being forgetting that he had committed to trusting God to provide, and makes his own plan to address the worry he experiences, a plan that results in disease and exile. Thankfully, for him and us this isn't the end of his journey with God but only the beginning, but we can still add it to our list of examples as to why we should seek God's wisdom as we go about life rather than trusting in our own faulty, human wisdom. I actually think it could have ended up a lot worse for him considering what he caused Pharoah, I'm surprised he left the country with his life let alone everything he had and his irresistably beautiful wife to boot! One last thing I must share today that totally alters the relavance of God's promises to Abraham for us please read Romans 9: 6-8 and Romans 4:13-17. These verses reveal to us what we may not have realized on our own as we read the account of Abraham (By the way, to clear up any confusion, Abram and Abraham are the same dude.)...that we have been added to the family line ofAbraham through our faith in Jesus Christ, so claim those promises folks. They are your inheritance passed down from father Abrham who had many sons. Many sons had father Abraham. I am one of them, and so are you, so let's just praise the Lord! This is where God as my Author hero comes into plat, I mean, isn't it just spectacular how he weaves his story and continues to do so! I love discovering all the little ways the Old and New testament fit together! Growing up, I thought the Old Testament was just that old and in the past, not really offering anything to me of real value...oh, how wrong I was! Its BEAUTIFUL! and studying it has completely deepened my relationship with Christ and my understanding of the New Testament! The things I thought I understoof before took on new life after reading through the Bible the first time, so please, join me as I journey thtough it again, so you might have a similar experience!:) I would recommend the NIV Study Bible for optimal understanding and enjoyment!!! If you get it in soft cover, the cost isn't too bad, but after about 10 years it might need rebound like mine does, but at least, it can be done! I haven't priced it yet, but I plan to soon and will let you know if its reasonable!

Bloggle study 1/5/10: Flood Waters and Rainbows

2010-01-07T04:18:00.000-08:00

In yesterday's Bloggle study I was led to address suffering that results from the sin in our lives, and I was plagued all day about the possibility that an innocent suffering individual would apply it to her siyuation and get confused, so I had decided in advance that I would address suffering from a second scriptural angle today, and lo and behold, my reading during my quiet time actually goes along with the scripture I had chosen in advance...hmmm...I wonder if God had a hand in that:) Beginning in John 9:1-3 As he[Jesus] went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him," Rabbi, who sinned this man or his parents, that he was born blind?" "Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus,but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life," and then, Jesus preceded to heal the man my spitting on the ground to make mud that he applied to the man's eyes before asking him to go wash in the Pool of Saloam. Also, there is the story of Job in the book of Job where God is upfront in letting us know that, Job, like, Noah, yesterday, was a righteous man describing him as blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil Job 1:1, yet he suffered greatly, and in this case it appears it was a test of the depth of Job's commitment and love for God, so we see two more examples as to why suffering may occur in one's life (1) to glorify God and (2) to test the sincerity and depth of our love for God. One other scripture occurs to me here Romans 8:20 For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the Children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of child-birth right up to the present time, so, it is my opinion, based on these verses, that it is possible that our suffering can sometimes simply be the result of existing in a frustrated and moaning world;) I believe the greatest pearl of wisdom to be identified is not the accurate identification of the source of our suffering because what does that accomplish of use other than possibly some comfort, or in yesterday's case, possibly some behavioral remediation, but rather, in identifying the source of surviving as we suffer! That is most definitely where I discovered treasure in the midst of the suffering that has visited my life on different occassions, so let's go on a treasure hunt in Matthew 7:24-27 Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house upon a rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against the house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. I'm pausing here before I go on because this first segment holds the treasure we seek in verse 1...hearing God's word and putting it into practice is what sustains us in the storms of life! I'm continuing on with the scripture because the next part describes the extent of the storm damage in the life of one who chooses to ignore what God has to say about life. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against the house, and it fell with a great crash! See, same storm, different ending, and I can attest to the truth of these words because I am that first man[or,in this case, woman who survived the storm with Jesus as my foundation.
Now, after a terribly long introduction, let's get down to business on today's reading...Genesis 7, 8, & 9. In these chapters we read more of Noah's storm in which the rain literally came down and the streams actually did rise until the whole earth was flooded, and please, take note of how Noah survived. He had heeded the word of God in his life to the point of looking like a fool and building a ginormous boat in a time and place that offered no place for it to float! He loaded it full of stinky animals at God's direction whether it made sense to him or not, and when the time for his storm arrived, God had prepared him to survive, and when Noah's storm was over, Noah built an altar to the Lord and, taking some of all the clean animals and clean birds, he sacrificed burnt offerings on it. The Lord smelled the pleasing aroma....Genesis 8:20-21 This blog is my altar after my storm, and it is my desire that the offerings that I present here create an aroma that is pleasing to the Lord! Next, the Lord introduced the rainbow, and I hope you will never look at one the same after reading this. In Genesis 9: 8-11 God makes a promise to Noah and the earth that he will never destroy the world by flood again, and he seals it with a rainbow...And God said, "This is the sign of the covenant I am making between me and you and every living creature with you, a covenent for all generations to come: I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth... I challenge you to not only be reminded of this at the sign of a rainbow, but also, that what sustained Noah in the storm was the fact he had heard God's words and acted in accordance to them in preparation for the storm, so if you haven't already, button down the hatches...get into God's word and put what you read into practice!

Bloggle Study:1/5/10: Image

2010-01-06T06:16:00.000-08:00

This morning I read Genesis 5 & 6 and was immediately struck again in verses 1-2 with the concepts I've already blogged about concerning us being created in God's image and verse 3 shows us a specific example to which we can relate of how God's image is displayed in us. When Adam had lived 130 years, he had a son in his own likeness, and he named him Seth. The more I meditate of this verse the more I love it! Let's see if I can express why....As a parent I know how deeply I adore my child who this verse describes as being made in my likeness, which is the same wording the Bible uses to describe our relationship with God, so in my mind God must adore you and I with the same depth that I experience as I watch my Lili grow and develop. I will never forget watching her learn to walk across the black and white tile in the basement of our old house when it struck me that my relationship with her as I reached down with adoring amusement to help her back to her feet after she had tumbled to the floor with a gentle thud because she had tried to take a few more steps than she had previously as she toddled along beside Mommy was the same as God's relationship with me as I have grown in my Christian walk and struggled with my sinful nature as I try to walk along side my Savior to the best of my ability. The realization was gold to me because I had always figured that God was mad when I messed up, so understanding that each time I fell in my struggle that he was right there arms extended inspecting for boo-boos with eyes filled with adoration, and could that be a bemused smirk on his face as he witnesses his daughter growing and developing into the woman he created her to be!? Oh, how I love my Savior!, and how awesome a parent/teacher/creator is he to have woven this similar relationship into our exsistences, so we could experience and know first hand how a parent feels about her child knowing it would result in us understanding more deeply how we are loved by the Creator in whose likeness we were made!? I could go on in this vein forever, but I must depart from it here, so I can share one other tid bit that touched me as I experienced God's word this morning. Not far past the first verse I highlighted, Adam's lineage is outlined in chapter 5, and as I read it not much holds great meaning for me although, I am sure it has a purpose that one with a more thourough Biblical education could explain. I do notice, however, in verse 22 something new is said of one of Adam's descendants. Enoch walked with God 300 years and had other sons and daughters. I can only hope that if there is ever a time when God records my life story for the education of future generations that he would say of me that Cori walked with God, or as it is said of Noah in chapter 6 that [Cori]Noah found favor in the eyes of the Lord, and later,[Cori] Noah was a righteous [woman] man, blameless among the people of[her]his time,[she]he walked with God, and finally in verse 22 [Cori] Noah did everything just as God commanded him. It is the desire of my heart to be such a child to my Creator that I could be described in such complimentary terms! I am afraid I often fall terribly short, but thankfully, as mentioned before, my Creator adores me anyway! I love this concept that the story that the Bible tells is continued in our lives because it is a reality that God's work and kingdom building continues today in our lives, so what will be said of you? Will you be one of the standouts in the list of your geneology who walked with God, or will you blend into the monotony of the list being skimmed over by the less educated readers who encounter your story? This is my question to myself. I don't have to be a leading character like Noah. I just want it to be said of me that I walked with God and served him faithfully in whatever role he gives me big or small!

Bloggle Study: 1/4/10

2010-01-05T21:20:00.000-08:00

Tonight I read Genesis 3 & 4 most of which is covered in the first chapter of The Story although I did find that a few segments were ommitted from these chapters unlike chapters 1 & 2 which were wholely represented in chapter 1. Anyway, the essence of what stood out to me from these passages of scripture is contained in the first part of chapter 3 verses 1-19. In this segment both Adam and Eve are tempted to ignore God's guidance and fall prey to Satan's crafty reasoning that God was just trying to boss them around like a big bully and keep then from enjoying life to the fullest( vs. 1-5). The verse that nearly makes me want to vomit is verse 6 (When the woman saw the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it.), not because I am appalled at Eve's reaction to the fruit after hearing Satan's sly sales-pitch, but because I can so easily relate to her faulty vision that so ignorantly fails to view the temptation through the corrective lens of God's word (2:16-17 and the Lord God commanded the man, " You are free to ear from any tree in the garden, butyou must not eat from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil , for when you eat of it you will surely die."). Ugh...Why do we do that? We know God, the creator of us and the world in which we exist who, as a result, loves us and possesses all possible wisdom on how this world works and how to exist in it in a joy-filled and contented manner has given us instructions on how to live here in such a manner. Why do we second guess his perfect love and wisdom and suggest that we know better what we need and what will make us happy? That's exactly what Eve did and exactly what we do every time we sin...We say, "God, we know you said no, but it looks good to me, so I'm gonna try it anyway because I know I can't be happy without it," and I think God must knowingly shake his head in frustration and pain as he stands by and heart-brokenly watches the child he loves experience the consequences from which he lovingly tried to shield her. We repeatedly force him away with our sin and disobedience, and how does our creator respond to his insolent, bratty creation? He goes to work constructing a beautifully intricate and merciful plan to satisfy his Godly and perfect requirement for justice in which he plays the staring and sacrificial role by coming to the earth he created as a man named Jesus Christ, so he could live the perfect life that we cannot and serve the punishment for our crimes of which he is totally innocent all so he could reestablish that intimate relationship that he longs for with each man, woman, and child he creates! What a wonderful God we have! Let's learn some things from Eve and these childhood stories from Genesis this time around...(1) God created this world, so it only makes sense that he knows how it works better than any other being! (2) He loves man/woman and desires above all else to be in an intimate relationship with him/her (3) these two facts together equate to the reality that God's word is based on his great wisdom and never-ending love, so his guidance will always have our best interests factored in already. We never need to second guess whether God has considered our happiness and contentment when instructing us because that is what he desires for our lives as well, so that is exactly where he intends to guide us! (4) if we choose to ignore God's guidance in any area of our lives, we might as well brace ourselves because we will soon learn from what God was attemptng to protect his beloved child. Don't go sassing God when you get what you asked for when you ignored his instruction. In fact, when you are bearing the consequences of your sin, feel loved because you know your Father-in-Heaven wanted to protect you from the heart-ache you are experiencing...He didn't choose it for you. He just allowed you to choose it for yourself, and you did because it looked soooo good, but now, you know what God did all along, its so bitter and nasty that its painful:( The good news is He loves you so much He already paid the eternal punishment for your poor decisions and you don't have to remain separated from him. You can receive the gift he offered you by dying on the cross for your sins, and start heeding his advice, and he will lead you from whereever you've gotten yourself lost at to the joy and contentment that he always intended for you! You've gotta love a God that good, loving, and merciful! I know I do!! Let him lead you to the joy-filled contented life he planned for you today! He's standing by waiting for you to seek his guidance from whereever you have landed yourself:)

Monday, January 3 : Bloggle Study Genesis 1 & 2

2010-01-04T06:56:00.000-08:00

Although I promised New Testament for my Bloggle Studies in 2010, my plans have changed due to a new read-through-the-Bible initiative my husband and I are participating in with our church family. As a congrgation we are reading the book The Story, not to be confused with my book This Is My Story, which is an adaptation of the Bible where in the text is presented as one seamless chronological story with only short transitional blurbs added to, well, assist in transition from one book to another...these are off set by italics so they are not confused as actual Biblical text. Anyway, Tim and I are reading bits of the chapter that will be reviewed in the oncoming weekend's sermon each evening before bed, and I am rereading the same scriptures in the morning during my Bible study and prayer time, so instead of beginning in Matthew, I will start with Genesis and follow along with The Story as our church progresses through it.
(Genesis 1 & 2) I began with Genesis 1 and 2 this morning, and I can't say that a great deal of it spoke to my heart in a fresh, impacting manner that I can clearly relay in writing. I was struck as I always am by Genesis 1:27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. I never understood the concept of being created in God's image nor had I been exposed to an explanation until in 2005 when I was attending a Bible Study Fellowship meeting during which the subject was covered. Ever since, a scripture that I had always just coasted by totally pops when I encounter it and has helped define how I relate my creator in recent years! During the said BSF meeting it was explained that God created us giving us small portions of his full-blown abilities and characteristics. For example, he can create out of nothing and enabled us to create from that which he has provided us. He loves perfectly and has enabled us to love as well although without perfection. The list of specific shared traits went on and on and facilitated a deepening in my relationship with my creator because now, I totally embrace him as my overall life mentor and hero. Everything that I am or that I attempt to be, he is except in a bigger, more perfect manner. The connection that I experience with my creator as a writer, a teacher, and a parent is wonderful! Knowing that he is each of those things as well except perfect in each category, allows me to look to him for wisdom and advice as I pursue each endeavor, and how blessed am I, to have the world's most renowned wrtier/teacher/parent as my right hand advisor? Even now, as I write this, I am amazed at his perfection in each of these areas for knowing to set things up this way, so our realtionships with him can be deeper and more meaningful. Oh, and that the creator of the universe desires to be in relationship with us to the extent that he devised all the minute details of creation so that a relationship with him would be more necessary and sought after, and once realized, blissful! God loves you and wants do be in a relationship with you so much that he designed you and the world you live in specifically so you would need him and seek him out, and he promises that if you do seek him, you will find him Matthew 7:7, so start seeking today and find a father who loves you perfectly without end Romans 8:35!

2009-12-26T02:17:00.000-08:00

A moment ago as I was sitting on my dining room floor unsuccessfully and excitedly attempting to assemble the Barbie 3-Story Dream Town House my daughter received for Christmas, I questioned the child-like glee I experienced as I applied the stickers to the tiny accessories and popped the furniture together while one of my favorite scriptures crept into my mind to taunt me and my fascination with a child's toy, so now, I have to take a recess to reread the scripture in order to determine whether there is something the Holy Spirit is trying to express to me. 1 Corinthians 13:11 When I was a child, I thought like a child, I talked like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. When you read this for yourself, start at the beginning of the chapter. It is so beautiful that it is enjoyable reading!
Barbie dolls were my all time favorite toy as a child, and I garner great enjoyment, now, sharing the love of this iconic toy with my daughter! There are a few questions, however, that remain unanswered Who enjoys them more? When I purchase Lili a Barbie related item, is it truley for her to enjoy or secretly for me? Before Lili was born and came of Barbie age, I had repressed my love for Barbie for years in order to put the things of childhood behind me as the verse hints, but now, that I have an excuse to play like a child, I'm using it! To clarify, I do not believe this scripture is refering to toys and play when it mentions"childish ways." In fact, I am confident it is speaking of spiritual childishness or immaturity. I love how Paul artfully concludes his statement concerning love with this thought in order to help our minds connect with the fact that true love as described in verses 4-7 is the height of spiritual maturity, so get out your childhood toys, and instead, put away impatience, meaness of all kinds, bragging and pride, rudeness, selfishness, quick-temperedness, grudges, distrust, losing hope, and giving up on people because those things are signs of true spiritual immaturity!
Although I will not admit immaturity because of my Barbie love, I must confess that after honestly evaluating my life and my relationships with those in it, I still have some maturing to work on in the New Year! You do the same..honestly evaluate your life and relationships based on the criteria set forth in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, and determine what "childish ways" you need to work on putting behind you in 2010 to continue down the path to spiritual maturity. Happy New Year and Many wishes for God's Blesings in your life in 2010!

Don't Judge A Gift By Its Wrapping

2009-12-19T18:05:00.000-08:00

I love buying Christmas gifts for the people in my life, so I had my shopping completed before November had expired, and I dedicated this past week to preparing all of those carefully chosen gifts to be received by my loved ones. Unfortunately, the challenge of wrapping them with my one capable hand/arm was met with only minimal success:( When I was nearly done and stopped to survey my work, I saw what could have easily passed as the accomplishments of my three-year-old. Jaggedly cut edges were visible where the two ends of the paper didn't quite find one another and wrinkles and lumps were all too prevalent an occurrence. Dejectedly, I accepted the fact that the days of distributing pretty Christmas packages were long gone. I would have to be satisfied with the knowledge that once the recipient made her way past the unsightly exterior she would thouroughly enjoy its contents. A verse came to my mind at this point that describes the outward appearance of the first and greatest Christmas gift that gives significance to my poorly wrapped Christmas offerings. Isaiah 53:2 says...there was nothing in his appearance that we should desirre him. He was despised and rejected by men...In other words, the very unattractively wrapped Christmas gift I will be distributing during the next week are the perfect representation of that first christmas gift:) I just love the way the Holy Spirit works to turn my frowns upside down! No matter how undesirable his appearance was, he brought a gift into this world that I could not live without... the possibility of joy unspeakable that won't go away and peace that is beyond all human understanding devoid of circumstance! Not that I am claiming that the gifts I have to offer my friends and family hold anything near as valuable as what Jesus offers to us, but they will always be a reminder to me and anyone who witnesses my creative wrapping skills, that we shouldn't judge a gift by its wrapping because no matter how unattractive it is there may be a treasure inside! Remember, as you wrap your gifts this Christmas that Jesus the greatest Christmas gift ever didn't arrive in perfectly smoothed paper with a shiny bow centered artfully on top instead he is described as being undesirable in appearance....just like the packages loaded in my truck to head home for family Christmas parties!

Addendum to Company for the Holidays

2009-12-15T09:17:00.000-08:00

I missed a main point that I wanted to make in my last post, so I'm going to try to make it here. God provides for our needs through his body the church. He provided for Tim and I in the instance of our move even when we had always felt we had no one to help by inspiring the hearts of those who love him to love us also through service, and more recently, he inspired my family's hearts to offer to help a friend. God is at work through his church, the people who love and serve him with their lives being bound together by Jesus Christ, so make yourself willing and available to bless those around you. Know that you are his hands, his feet, and his presense as Christmas and the new year approach.

Company for the Holidays

2009-12-15T07:16:00.000-08:00

If you had been following this blog, you probably noticed my absence over the past couple weeks. My wonderful husband wisked my daughter and I away on a surprise vacation to Disney World. It was a great time, and on the way home when I was using my phone to catch up on my facebook friends, I noticed one of them had posted that she was feeling alone during this Holiday season due to a recently broken home and tight finances. As I considered this friend's situation I began to feel guilty for the joy, peace, and blessing that I experience in my own life, and wondered, "Why me?" aloud to my husband. He quickly responded by suggesting we offer assistance to this friend to which I agreed as I was transported back to a night in my hospital bed with my husband standing to my left side while the low glow of the room light illuminates us in my memory like a spot light. My husband was sharing the events of a busy day of moving that had been accomplished by our church family and people from his work on our behalf the weekend after my stroke. Prior to my stroke we had always teased each other about our recluse-like nature and joked around that we had no close friends, which is what seemed true to us at the time, so we wondered at the crowds of people who showed up to accomplish the task that we were unable to do on our own as the storm raged in our lives. I was struck so clearly in that moment that God had provided for our need in a very practical way and assured that he would continue to do so no matter what the next moment held. I love sharing these stories because they take me back to moments when I basked in the assurance of God's presence in specific moments of my life. Its important to note that his involvement didn't guarentee that the bad stuff didn't happen or that the unpleasant went away, but even more valuable, it guarenteed that I was never alone in my struggle and neither are you! If you are feeling alone, open your eyes to God's presence in your life, and reciprocate his love and faithfulness. Its time to really start believing God's promises that are realized in our lives only through Christ Jesus...not just believing in his existence but taking him at his word and resting in what he says! Hebrews 13:5 ...because God has said," Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you, So we say with confidence, The Lord id my helper; I will not be afraid.

Disney's Jungle Juntion, Compost, and the Power of Jesus

2009-12-02T08:10:00.000-08:00

My dughter, Lili, is a huge fan of one of Disney's newest shows, Jungle Junction. I was watching an episode with her the other day and was struck by an unintended message that the program expressed. One of the characters had been collecting fruit and vegetable scraps to create a big compost pile for the communities' garden, and the other residents of jungle Junction were greatly opposed to the project because of the terrible odor that it caused, but they soon found out after the compost was applied to the garden, that it was responsible for helping produce the sweet, sweet smell of the jungle lily. In other words, the stinky stuff ended up having a beautiful aroma in the end that all the characters were pleased with, so they changed their tune about the stinky compost all together in the end. This story brought to mind my feelings about the events of my life. My stroke and open-heart surgery are the equivalent of the stinky stuff that no one wanted around at first, but I can now catch a wiff of something very sweet brewing as a result because of the power of Jesus at work in my life! How awesome is a God who can take tradgedy and heart-ache and turn it into great memories and joy!? How awesome is a God who can take stinky compost and grow a beautiful, fragrant jungle lily!? Okay, I guess that instance was just the magic of Disney, but I can promise you Disney nor anyone else could duplicate what the power of Jesus has accomplished in my life!

Bloggle Study: Matthew 5-7 (Silence)

2009-12-01T05:04:00.000-08:00

These scriptures are my favorites because they are Jesus's words, and I feel so close to him when I read them like I am sitting on his lap getting a personal lesson. His teachings are challenging to anyone at any point in her spiritual walk if she is honest with herself as she reads but filled with so much wisdom, hope and promise at the same time! I LOVE ME SOME JESUS! He responds, "Really?" "Well, if you love me, obey my teachings....love you enemies and pray for those who persecute you. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn from the one who wants to borrow from you, Cori." These are what I find to be the most challenging out of these instructions for life from the mouth of my Savior. There is such a feeling of self-preservation that rises up in me at the sound of these words no matter how many times I hear them, but I know good and well that God loves me and along with being the creator of this world making him the one being who knows it inside and out these two factors cause me to trust him implicitly! He knows how things work down here from a creator's perspective and he loves me, so he is only going to guide me in the directionthat is beat for me! Knowing and believing those tow things whole-heartedly squelch that pesky hinderance of self-preservation...as if I could preserve myself! I have learned by living as a committed -follower of Jesus Christ for the past 15 to 20 years that there has not been a single instance in which I have received bad advice from God's word! I trust its guidance with my everything! In fact, there have been times when the teachings have sounded absolutely nuts to me like give more to someone who takes from you, WHAT!, but it is fool-proof to provide the best possible outcome because God knows what he's talking about, and he loves each one of us dearly and wants to guide us to joy, peace, and contentment!:) There is so, so much I could say about individual verses here...I just love these passages! They are brimming with precious truth and wisdom ripe for the plucking, but I'm going to try to just choose a few of my favorites that seemed to stand out especially today, maybe, God meant them for one of you?

(6:25-30)We've all heard the birds of the air comarprison a millon times and still worry out the wazoo...but why? because, Jesus Christ, you know the guy, tells us right here that God's got it covered, the birds don't scurry around, sowing reaping and storing up, but they have food, and verse 28, why do you worry about clothes? This one hit me today!and verses 31-33 if we make attaining the kingdom of heaven our primary goal the food and clothes come as a package deal, so stop putting God off because you don't have the $$ to quit your job and serve in the way he is asking you to, or any otherscenario you're living in which concerns for your physical needs are hendering your walk because he's got it covered...believe him because, remember, he loves you and has your best interest in mind! If you keep putting him off, you might miss out on something really great he's trying to lead you to! That would suck, now, wouldn't it!

(7:7-12) I love these passages because I found then true time after time when I needed advice from the wisest being I know or when I simply covet his tangible presence...he (or she in my case) who seeks finds. It blows me over its so simple! If you want God or his wisdom just earnestly seek it out through prayer and reading his word, and you WILL find it! This is why I get so excited when someone is making an effort to look for God because his word promises he will be foun by that individual who is seeking. How awesome that he is so available to us! I don't believe this is like a list to Santa or anything, but even better its about forging a relationship with the creator of the universe!

(7:24-27) These words are particularly dear to me because if you've read any of my other posts, you may have noticed that I've gone through some stuff in the last couple years, my storm, as I refer to it, so these words speak to my heart in a way that causes a physical reaction everytime! I have felt the prickling sting of the cold, unwelcome rain that caught me unexpecting, and my feet have quite literally become numb as the cold rushing flood waters rose past my ankles, and the winds wipped and blew against me so hard they left lasting physical damage that cannot be repaired by man, yet (I) it did not fall, because (I) it had (my) foundation on the rock (Jesus Christ) ! Just typing that brings me to awe inspired tears! God is so awesome and loving and faithful and worthy of all our time respect and attention! Go on to read the words describing the individual who did not have her foundation on Jesus...the rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against the house, and it fell with a GREAT CRASH! Having chosen to serve and follow Jesus with my life in a very intentional and committed manner prior to my storm all I heard was TOTAL SILENCE, you know, the kind you can hear. Silence and peace in my soul to this day! Thank you Jesus! This is so NOT a testament to anything good about me but a blaring testament to my awesome, good, and faithful God! What I get from this and hope you do too is that the Bible is truth and wisdom straight from the lips of a wise and loving God and very worth acknowledging as we live our daily lives! (I hate to put a plug for my book in here, so I will separate it from the paragraph with parenthesis. If you want to read the story of how I built the foundation of my life on Jesus and his teachings, order a copy from tate publishing.com or any other online book seller. It can also be ordered from any book store by providing the title and author This Is My Story, by Cori Lukomski.) It is also important to note the foundation that sustains a person in the storms of life is built by hearing Jesus's teachings and putting them into practice fron verse 24.

Bloggle Study: Matthew 1-4

2009-11-30T17:12:00.000-08:00

I didn't wake up as early as I should have this morning, so I am a little later than I had planned in posting this, but earlier this morning I read the first four chapters of Matthew. These scriptures begin with the geneology of Christ which has a signifigance that I am not qualified to explain, but it has been explained to me before, and unfortunately, I do not remember the explanation well enough to feel capable of adequately repeating it here, but I do know God had a purpose for including it in his word! I think I remember it has something to do with establishing that Jesus' lineage truely does fulfill prophecy, but that is all I will say there. From that point, it leads into the story of Jesus's birth which we celebrate this time of year. In chapter 3 we meet John the Baptist and come accross the words in verses 8-10 that spoke to my heart a little over a week ago and in combination with other scripture that God gave me during other study times that led me to write this blog and work on starting to add speaking to my writing ministry, Produce fruit in keeping with repentance...the ax is already at the root of the trees , and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire. These words challenged me to question whether I was producing good fruit for God with the actvities I had been committing my time to since my stroke. I could not answer with a resounding, "YES," while at one time I could have, so I set to work evaluating my life in order to identify what might be hendering my fruitfulness. I remembered a different scripture God had lain on my heart earlier in the fall concerning laziness;however, I cannot recall the exact location of the verse only that it called me out on my sleeping so much that I didn't have time in my day to do anything beyond the necessary tasks of everyday life leaving time studying God's word and praying along with giving my best to actively serve him completely off my to do list for way too long! Anyway, this combination of messages from my Creator has spurred me on to kick it in gear although I have already confessed to failing to be faithful in getting out of bed at a reasonable hour this morning:P Hopefully, knowing that someone might be reading along will give me enough of a feeling of accountability to raise me from bed to spend some time with God on future mornings! Anyway, my goal these days is to get up early, so I have some uninterrupted time to spend with God, post my Bloggle study for the day in hopes of producing some good fruit for God. All the thoughts that led to this conclusion reminded me of another time in my Christian walk when I was called to fruitfulness...The details of this story can be found in my book,This Is My Story, but the scripture that was speaking to me at that time was Phillipians 1:22 For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. This scripture has been a goal and a challenge to me for a long time now! Oh to love Christ so much that I truely consider it the greater blessing to die and be with him than to go on living in the flesh! I continue to pray that God will bring me to a full realization of this sentiment, but more recently, the words, if I am to go on living in the body have spoken to me more loudly than any others because I have faced the other if, the if I am not to go on living, but life is the if that God chose for me, so if I am to continue living in this body, this will mean fruitful labor for me! At least, I'm going to make my best effort at it anyway! Now, just to clarify, I don't mean this as a means of salvation because the Bible is quite clear that faith in Jesus is the only way to be saved, not by works. I'm not questioning my salvation here. I'm questioning my faithfulness to my Savior. I love him and want my life to communicate that love to him as clearly as possible, so I evaluate my life periodically to ask myself how well I am loving my Savior with my life. The answer I came accross this time was get out of bed and tell others you love him, so they might love him more too!:)

Peace and Joy: The Heart of the Holidays

2009-11-28T13:58:00.000-08:00

Joy to the World....Peace on Earth...Do you ever hear these phrases, look around at the world/earth, and wonder what they are referring to or where they are? Where is the joy? Where is the peace? What do these two highly sought after but seemingly elusive states of being have to do with Christmas? Is it just a reference to the warm fuzzy feeling we experience when we are gathered with friends and family or watch children exclaim with enthusiasm over a generous and anticipated gift? I'm going to step out of the box and say NO WAY! The peace and joy referenced in these two phrases refer to something much more sacred and precious than those, and I must say that I believe its time we stop wasting the holidays yammering on about the relatively insignificant blessings of family and material possessions and actually get to the heart of the holiday season...the peace and joy that Jesus came to offer to each one of us personally! I'm talkinfg about the overwhelming peace and joy that dwell within an individual independent from her environment or experiences when she chooses to receive the gift of Jesus and accept him as Lord and Savior of her life. Those two words have become just as generic in our vocabulary as peace and joy, so I must stop to clarify what I mean when I write them...LORD: boss, individual to whom total control is relinquished...Savior: the one relied upon to save an individual.When we submit totally to Jesus in these two ways, Christmas reigns in our lives daily! I am sharing this because this is what I have experienced undeniably for over a year now, and I know it isn't a gift for me to hoard to myself but rather one intended to be shared among all of God's creation. I believe that if we ever embrace these truths along with the Bible's other teachings as a group that will be the time we will be able to look around and actually witness the possibility of peace and joy that God sent to the earth when Jesus was born being birthed into the world around us. My point is that the peace and joy spoken of during the holiday season are not enjoyable, mythic characters like Santa Claus. They are real, and true and tangible realities that are available for the taking to anyone prepared to accept the gift that Jesus offers through his birth, life and death on the cross and make him Lord of her life! I can attest to thir existance! If you don't believe me, come witness me personally as I hobble through life with only one functioning arm and the resulting difficulties as a constant companion. In spite of that, I dwell in the peace and joy of Jesus Christ every day! I want you to be able to experience these treasures that are available to you as well, so I continue to yammer on about them post after post hoping it will catch in your heart, and you will believe that Jesus is worth seeking out, and he promises that if you seek him, you WILL FIND HIM. (Matthew 7:7) So, seek out the peace and joy of Christmas this holiday season! Its been gift wrapped and waiting for you since before you were born at the foot of the cross:) Accept the gift God is offering to you his precious creation that he loves endlessly( so much so that he came to earth taking on human form in order to pay the punishment for the wrong things you have done and will do.)

Happy Birthday, Jesus!

2009-11-27T23:40:00.000-08:00

Birthdays are huge at my house! I'm totally over the top because I love the idea of celebrating life what a person has accomplished so far and what is yet to come along with a celebration of the plan God is working out in that person's life...a chance for a person to evaluate her progress down the road of life and commit to making whatever changes are necessary to reach the desired endpoint at the desired time...as if she gets to coose either one of those things, but that is what I love about birthdays along with the party planning, decorations, cake, and gifts! so, what I'm thinking is....what am I going to do to make sure Jesus has the happiest of all birthdays this year? Of course, there is the party decor on which we are already working, and the birthday cake, but this scripture has been playing on my heart this year as the holidays have approached...just like Jesus wrote his wish list on my heart...Matthew 25:40 I tell you the truth, whatever you do for the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me...So, that's it.....Jesus wants you, and me and everyone else to love the least in his name this and every year for his birthday! One very sinple idea...Tim, Lili, and I are baking and decorating salt dough ornaments to distribute at the rehabilitation facility where I was placed after my stroke...its cheap, its fun, and it creates wonderful memories all while you are giving an awesome gift to the creator of the universe. I mean, think about it who else has a life more worth celebrating? Not only did he live it perfectly and intentionally on our behalf, but he sacrificed it to pay the punishment for our wrong things! Now, that's something I'm going to celebrate!

Salt Dough Recipe

2 cups four
1 cup salt
1 cup water

Preheat oven: 325. Mix ingredients. May need to finish by kneading with hands. Roll out on a lightly floured surface. Use cookie cutters to form shapes or design by hand remembering that the thicker the ornament the longer it will take to bake! Add detail with forks, knives etc. Use a straw to poke a ribbon hole at the top of the ornament for hanging later. Bake in the preheated oven for 90 minutes. remove and let cool before decorating with acrylic paints, glitter, googly eyes, and ribbon.

for a ginger bread looking dough, add coffe to it before shaping into ornaments or use food coloring to create a custom look.also, possibly, I haven't tried this, so I can't promise it will work, add cinnomon, or flavored extracts to the dough to make it scented. If you try it like that, let me know how it turns out, please:)

Finally, string with ribbon and disrtibute to the least for Jesus:)

Call Me Crazy: A Belated Thanksgiving Post

2009-11-27T00:55:00.000-08:00

I can barely think the thoughts required to type this post. Each one I have, my mind automatically stops and questions itself, but I've run over them so many times that I know they're true! I have come to the point that I am totally thankful for my stroke, the resulting brain damage and loss of physical function/independence, open-heart surgery, and the unsightly scar that came along with it( knid of like the toy in a kids meal!). Why do I say these insane things? Each of these additions to my life story ( to steal the words from a jewel of a therapist on one of my mopey days) has enriched my ability to experience life to the extent that the simplest moments are magical!:) I mean, how many people get the privelege of remembering a time when they couldn't get up in the night to pee independently or use the restroom in privacy no matter what call nature was sending and getting to celebrate internally(or externally if you want to wake everyone up, in this case.) each time you can in the future? Night time potty breaks aren't the only activity infused with this heightened awareness of what a privelege it is to be and do. The list goes on and on of what I couldn't and what I now CAN accomplish on my own, SO essentially thanks to my stroke,etc. my life is one little party after another:) The holiday really brought out the I can cook independently party!:) Anyway, I just adore this new perspective with which I have the rare privelege of viewing life!, so I am adding my stroke to my list of things for which I am thankful! Oh yeah, my scar...its just fun now that its healed...like battle scar, and it really freaks people out when they get a peek of it! Really, I guess its just how a person chooses to look at things in the end:) I praise God for helping me see these otherwise unfortunate events as blessings! Thank you Father! I love you SO, SO much!

A child's prayer-My love story

2009-11-24T14:39:00.000-08:00

I always dreaded the question,"so, how did you meet?" because I didn't feel that Tim and I had a very good love story. We met my freshman year in highschool(He was a senior.) but didn't begin to date exclusively until I was a sophmore and neither of us being very committed to following Jesus at that point didn't necessarily make honoring God the highlight of our relationship:( One good thing other than us marrying eventually that came out of our relationship, Tim barely knew the name of Jesus when we met, but by the time we were married he had heard and embraced the gospel whole heartedly, which led to now, Tim being a fully-devoted follower of Jesus Christ and an amazing husband and father. See boring ,until...FLASHBACK...I'm, maybe, twelve huddled in the worn blankets of my bed in my parent's home with tear streaked cheeks illuminated by the street light shining through the high windows of our late 60's ranch. My heart is broken in the way only a pre-pubescent girl's heart can be broken by the cruel words of an unappreciative crush. Being just about as awkward and ugly as a 7th grade girl can be, I mean acne, braces, glasses...everything, the boy I had crushed on since 3rd grade had responded by barking like a dog that day when the secret I had held close to my heart for 4 long years became public knowledge:( Now, with my heart raw from rejection, I went to the only place I knew to provide eternal, unconditional acceptance...my Father-in Heaven. "Father, please, let me meet someone who will love me for who I am!" I silently sent the plea heavnward countless times not really knowing whether God entertained the silly, romantic musings of children or not, but I had to give it a try...FLASHFORWARD...Freshman year...all of the sudden...boys like me now including one intense and persistent boy named Tim who happened to be dating another girl at the time...see what I mean...what kind of love story begins with that!? Anyway, by the time Sophmore year rolled around, they were over, and Tim ever needing a companion called me up, and we quickly became an item in spite of the fact I suspected he might still be carrying a jones for the girl....see it just gets worse doesn't it!:P.....FLASHFORWARD As we dated I found out that Tim stuck like glue, and that glue kept its hold through two years of college and led to a marriage proposal during my sophmore year at the University of Evansville and a wedding date set for the summer( August 5, 2000) before my Junior year. I was a reluctant bride because I was never entirely convinced that Tim really loved me for who I was because of our crazy, totally unromantic beginning. FLASHFORWARD once again to a hospital room on the neuro-floor where a young husband keeps faithful vigil over his dying wife who, up to this point, has survived the massive stroke that has unexpectedly stolen half her physical function. When it becomes apparent that she was going to survive, he stayed right by her side fighting with her to regain as much function as she possibly could, but not once did he recoil from the task ahead even when the possibility existed that she might be dependent indefinitely. His only concern was her comfort and that she survive to share life with him rather than hoping that she might expire, so he wouldn't be burdened with the load of a nearly 30-year-old requiring assistance toileting. At some unexact point in the tedious weeks that followed, I realized that this man loved me exactly as I was for the woman he had known and still knew whether he had to help me wipe my rear and escort me safely to the restroom forever or not. It became apparent to me that I was a precious treasure to this man who had spent the weeks and then months following my stroke doting on me and ensuring that I had everything necessary to live comfortably in my new handicapped state no matter what the cost. My husband's unfailing love transported me back to that night in my childhood bed with the dark room lit by the street light and tears coursing down my cheeks when I cried out to God for just such a companion, at the time, not even realizing what I was asking for or to what extent I would need to be loved unconditionally in the future, I mean, this was a little more than glasses and zits, and I KNEW with all my heart that this man was and always had been the answer to that childhood prayer. How had I missed it before, now to think, I didn't believe I had a good love story!? Never will I take for granted the precious gift my husband is to me from my Father-in-Heaven, or will I feel ashamed of this amazing love story written by the creator of the universe.Now, Tim and I have shared nearly 10 amazing years together, and I love him more everyday, and I can honestly say our relationship is heavenly! I LOVE YOU, TIM! THANK YOU FOR LOVING ME WHEN EVEN I AM DISGUSTED WITH MYSELF!

Matthew 7:7-8 Ask and it will be given to you. Seek and you will find;Knock and the door will be open to you . For everyone who asks receives;he who seeks finds;and to him who knocks the door will be open.

Thank you, Father in Heaven for listening and answering to even a child's earnest request! Never think that God hasn't heard you or responded to your prayers. You could be holding the answer in your arms already and not realize it! God has so got your back!:), and he is so absolutely serious about his promises, so take them seriously!

God's Houseplan

2009-11-24T02:00:00.000-08:00

"This is PERFECT!"are the words my therapist explained as she walked through the doors of my new home on my predischarge safety home evaluation into the welcoming, wheel-chair friendly ,wide-open spaces of the home God had prepared especially for this moment in time, one that I never could have anticipated, but one that he lovingly prepared me for anyway. I had suffered a massive stroke a month before, and was excitedly anticipating the possibility of living in this home my husband and I had purchased not even a month before, our church family and my husband's work pitched in and moved all our stuff for us, so closing on our old house could take place as planned! At my therapist's exclamation, James 1:17 stormed into my mind with authority....Every good and PERFECT gift comes from above, coming dowm from the father of heavenly lights,who does not change like the shifting shadows, and in that moment I knew that this was a house that God built expressly for me, a revelation that has been affirmed a millon times since!
Earlier in the summer my husband and I had commemced with a serious house hunt when we sold our home unexpectly sold while we were on vacation. Not surprisingly, at first we had difficulty finding a home that fit our tastes in our price-range; however, we did eventually settle on a remodeled 1970's tri-level that boasted a ton of space and fresh paint. When our offer was accepted we rejoiced but continued to pray the prayer that we had muttered silently to our creator from the initiation of the tedious process...Father, please guide us to the home that will best meet our needs as a family in the future. We moped dejectedly forgetting the request we had made of our maker when the deal fell through after the home inspection, turns out no matter how pretty the paint job, a 1970's house is still over 30 years old!;) When my realtor spoke the words, "It must not have been meant to be. God has a plan that we don't always understand." I must stop here to say that the foreshadowing is freaky, and God, the author of our lives is my author hero as well as my every other hero! Anyway, when she spoke those words, I took them as a trite, albeit kind statement, you know the comforting jargon we pull out but don't really mean when someone is upset because we don't know what else to say. Turns out, she was dead right! Not long after these prophetic words were spoken, I fell to the floor on a Saturday morning while we were making plans to go shopping for the new house, the new construction one on 2.5 acres outside a small town similar to the one where we grew up that we had quickly chosen after the first deal fell through, so we would have a home when the new owner moved into our old house that we had sold what now seemed prematurely, because a blood clot had lodged itself in my middle cerebral artery preventing the flow of oxygen to my brain and effectively suffocating and killing a vast number of the brain cells that I relied on to run the left side of my body. When this event occurred, it left me in a state in which the 1970's tri-level would have been a complete nightmare to come home to after rehab, so God being faithful to answer our prayers, acted upon what he knew about future events of our lives and squashed the deal and presented us with the spectacular home he had begun to prepare for us more than a year prior to the life-altering event, and my therapist recognized his signature immediately,"PERFECT! Since then, as I mentioned before, God's perfect design in this home has beem affirmed countless times from the initially necessary walk-in shower in the master bath to the hose like faucet in the kitchen, I could go on and on about the special features that God included in this supposedly generic spec home that a builder just happened to build with no buyer in mind a year before my stroke perfectly accomodated to my post-stroke needs! Wow! Isn't God AWESOME to provide for his children in such PERFECT ways! I was reminded of this once again yesterday when I was able to fill a large pot with water in the kitchen without assistance thanks to the hose like faucet on my kitchen sink and, then, just slide the heavy water-filled pot to the buner accross the smooth suface of the counter and cook top. Significant to me because, otherwise, I would not have been able to accomplish this simple feat with my singular functioning hand and arm. I am in awe of God's PERFECT LOVE to the point of writer's block...there simply are no words! Oh yeah, I want to point out that God is taking care of you in the same way right now:):), so no need to worry about the future. Its in God's very capable, loving hands! Just trust him with it!

Deep Breath

2009-11-22T15:32:00.000-08:00

Whew! My daughter's emerging three-year-old independance has been rough on me today, and I have to admit to reacting to her behavior more like a three-year-old than a thirty-something a few times...I wonder often these days how God does it...keep his patience, I mean. The more times I fall short of his parenting perfection as a mother, the more I love him as my heavenly Father because it does not escape me that when my daughter responds,"because I wanted to!" after I ask"why?" in reference to her disobedience that it is no different than when I do the same thing to God...how often do I end up saying"because I wanted to!" to him? Just as I, as a mother, set boundaries for my daughter that she cannot fathom a reason for their existance, so she jumps the fence right into the predicament from which I was trying to protect her, God sets boundaries for me that I don't always understand, and like my daughter, I often find myself knee deep in the mess God was hoping the daughter he loves could avoid! Hopefully, tomorrow I won't be so self-righteous in response to my lovely child's age-appropriate, yet annoying behavior and remember that I too am a developing child who has not nearly reached perfection with a Heavenly Father who, thankfully, manages me with perfect, never-tiring patience and love...I wonder how often he wonders about me,"how long is this stage going to last?" I wonder it about myself often enough! thank you ,Lord, for your patience as I grow and develop into the woman you want me to be! Help me to imitate that same patience as I interact with the beautiful creation that you have placed in my care!

The Flipside

2009-11-20T13:17:00.000-08:00

As I sop up urine from my wood floors for the third time today, I am reminded that there is a flipside to my faith that I would be remiss not to share. Luke 9:23-25 If anyone would come after me he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world and yet lose or forfeit his very self? In my previous post I mentioned being intimidated and scared about heading down this road with Jesus, but i didn't detail my fears, then, so I will be more specific now. Did you notice before that I dropped the ball on God's calling before when I gave birth to my beautiful daughter now age three (potty-training age hence the pee)? When she entered this world, my desire to be an awesome mommy pushed every other priority in my life out the window or, at least, to the edge where I left them teetering unaware of their precarious location until recently when I finally became aware of God's call once again and realized that I had unwittingly gotten off track. As God called me back to faithful service, the fears that had originally pushed him to the side began to desperately fight for my attention, "What if this thing God is asking of me takes more time than I am comfortable giving? I don't want to give up any time with Lili, and what if this changes my carefree, relaxed existance?"Thankfully, the elementary curruculum I have been writing for my church's 3rd-4th graders has kept this verse from Luke 9 in the forefront of my mind, so as i faced these excuses in addition to doubts in my ability in the face of God's call, I was reminded that to truely be a follower of Christ one must be willing to deny her fleshly desires to further God's plan in her life. The first thing I've had to deny in order to move forward with Jesus is my laziness because sleeping in until 10AM doesn't leave enough time to devote to being a mom, housework, and marketing my book. Secondly, the whole Lili thing,not that I'm saying I'm going to push her out of the way now, not ever. I'm going to have to pray about that one because I don't know what it all means. I do know that doing things God's way is the only way to function in this world and still experience peace, joy, and contentment, so God's way it is! Pray for me as I strive daily to deny whatever fleshly desires crop up in an attempt to derail my journey down this new path with Jesus. Oh, yeah, back to the urine...there was a point to that...if I hadn't been blogging, I would have been more on top of my daughter's voiding and not had the messes, so it reminded me that soppping up pee was just my cross to bear for Jesus today;) Not anywhere near as uncomfortable as the one he bore for me and you!

2009-11-20T09:45:00.000-08:00

This is all new to me. I'm a lot intimidated and a little scared, but I know this is where God has led me, so I press on trusting in my creator's wisdom and love as he sets the course for my life. This is by no means the first time we have set out on a journey together, and that is how I know that following Jesus, my light in this dark world, is the only thing I want to do whether I am unfamiliar with and intimidated by where he is leading me or not. Well over three years ago God called me to his service through a series of events that are detailed in my book This Is My Story(available at tatepublishing.com or Amazon.com), and I am just now picking up where I left off after my daughter was born in 2006. More recently, God has been calling me to continue using my life to praise and honor him in a manner that will produce fruit for his kingdom. Around a year and a half ago, I had an MCA (middle cerebral artery) stroke that has left me partially paralyzed on my left-side. Initially, I was wheel-chair bound and totally dependant, but after months of therapy I am able to walk with relative independance although I still utilize a muscle stimulation unit by Bioness, Inc., and have regained most of my independance:) My stroke was chased exactly a month later by open-heart surgery to repair what was found to be holes in the septum of my heart that had contributed to the occurance of my stroke. Something I noticed as I recuperated in my hospital bed after each trauma was that visitors and well-wishers arrived expecting to find a crushed young mother mourning the distruction of her life only 28 years in the making. I witnessed surprise play across face after face and realized over time that the surprise was rooted in the fact that I still had a smile on my face no matter how lopsided it was at this point. It was a wonder to most that I wasn't despairing because I believe they felt as if they would have been in a similar situation. This is by no means a tribute to myself but simply a shining example of why I am totally in love with Jesus Christ because having built my life on the foundation of his teaching, I was sustained in the storm of life just like his word promises in Matthew 7:24-27. I am, now, blogging because I want you to have a chance to be able to say the same after the storms of your life pass. God loves you and desires to sustain you in this life as well, so much so that he has called me to use my life as a means of introduction between the two of you. I love and value you because I know God does, and my love for him results in you being important to me, so I want to share this treasure I have found with you in a real and personal manner that I hope you will be able to relate! The best thing about God's suatenance is that it consists of a steady diet of joy, peace, contentment, and blessing! If that sounds like something that interests you keep reading My Little Light no matter who you are, a Christian, an unbeliever, a skeptic, or a seeker you are most welcome to read and consider the beautiful ways God has influenced my life, and more importantly, the beautiful ways he hopes to influence yours. I sit here typing with my affected arm contracted in an unnatural twist that creates discomfort in my shoulder yet I am,honestly, perfectly contented and at peace with my life. That's the place I hope this blog will lead you to minus the crazy arm!...only the peace and contentment to you!